If Fate Would Allow It
by BubblingIllusion
Summary: Touko and N never saw each other again after their farewell...but if only they had different circumstances, if only they were given a second chance, if only they could be reborn. If fate were to allow it...would they reveal their true feelings?
1. Who Are You?

**Who are you?**

"Well then." N turned around and smiled at me gently. Although he was smiling I could see it was a melancholy smile, I could sense that this was goodbye was tearing him open from the inside."Farewell."

"N! Wait!" I grabbed onto his shirt before he was able to climb on Zekrom. I tightened my grip and unconsciously lowered my head. Little tear drops started to form and fall as I think about him leaving me forever. "Will we be able to meet again?"

"If fate allows it." N took my hand off him, he held it firmly as he gazed at me. Our eyes locked nostalgically for a few seconds, N then cringed and let go of my hands. He then quickly jumped onto Zekrom and ascended into the sky.

"NNNN!" I called out desperately but that was the last time I ever saw him again. If I could choose to reverse time, if i could repeat this whole treacherous journey again...just to be able to get a glimpse of your face...then it would. If only fate really did allow us to meet again .

***200 years later***

"Cherennnn~" I called out while running towards the school gates. He turned around slowly while pushing his glasses up.

"Hm, well aren't you happy this morning." He commented.

"Of course! Bel was talking about the school hiring a REALLY handsome doctor yesterday." I beamed. "I'm going to go to the infirmary everyday if that's true."

"Why do you girls even bother with these things? I know Accumula High School doesn't get new staff often but still..." Cheren sighed and shook his head. "Well just make sure you don't get too carried away."

"Geez I won't, you worry too much Cheren." I laugh as I ran ahead of him.

I really wonder what kind of person our new doctor will be like. Maybe he's interested in Pokémon too, I mean I'm no Pokémon trainer but I still have my own Tepig. Professor Juniper gave him to me a little over a week ago but I'm not really interested in training it. I just want to be able to get into a good college after I graduate high school but Tepig is a pretty companion I guess. I ran up the stairs of the 2nd building towards the infirmary. I slammed open the door with great haste.

"Teacher! I've hurt myself! May I have some bandages?" I yelled enthusiastically. A young man wearing a white lab coat standing at the window desk turned towards me; he was tall, his hair was long and shaggy, it was green and tied up in a low ponytail. He looked surprised but his face appeared very gentle, his green eyes met with mine. I stand there frozen; I could only continue staring. W-What was this feeling? It feels like…nostalgia almost but I'm sure I have never seen this young man before. I took a few unsteady steps forward, my body was moving by itself.

"N…" I murmured.

"Touko…" He muttered back.

Eh? How did he know my name? And how did I know his? What is this? This feels a little bit like Déjà vu but I've never seen this guy before so how could I possibly? This is really weird… I don't know him but somehow I feel like I've been with him my entire life. I feel like I've had a strong connection with this stranger before but…when? Where? How?

"Eh? D-do I know you?" I asked frantically.

"U-um I don't believe so b-but how do you know my name?" He asked looking slightly flustered.

"A-ah I'm not too sure myself." I looked down towards my feet. "B-but somehow I feel like I know you."

"Same. Have we met somewhere?" He stepped away from the window to take a little closer look at me.

"I don't think so…" I looked up into his eyes. They were a very unique shade of green; it was like looking at jade crystal. I couldn't turn away, I felt like I could stare forever. It seems that he was doing the same; we gazed at each other for a few seconds but it feels more like an hour. However why does my heart hurt a little when I look at him? Strange. It's kind of like a deep sinking feeling...a feeling of hopelessness maybe? A mixture of joy and sadness, a mixture of love and pain. The more I look the more I feel like crying. Whether those tears will be out of happiness or sorrow I don't know. Suddenly realizing that we had been fixing our eyes on each other for a while now I turn away in embarrassment.

"A-ah sorry." He flung back in shock.

"N-no it's alright." I started fidgeting with my skirt as he quickly walked to the medicine cabinet.

"You said you need bandages right?" He asked while rummaging through the cabinet. "Here, use these."

"Thanks you." I took the bandages and scurried out the door. "B-bye teacher."

I rushed back into my classroom which is a few rooms down the corridor from the infirmary. My heart was beating so fast I felt like it was going to explode. How can you possibly feel this way for someone you just met? This is insane, after 16 years of not falling in love. I could still feel my cheeks flushing as I sat down in my seat next to Bel. She seemed to have notice my intense blushing and giggled a little in amusement.

"Well, did you go see the new doctor?" She smiled cheerfully.

"Y-yeah I went." I breathed out a heavy sigh.

"Hmm? Was he not to your liking?" She cocked her head to the side a little.

"N-no that's not it." I chuckled halfheartedly.

"Alright Homeroom's starting, please return to your assigned seats." The teacher commanded as she walked into the room. "This morning we have assembly so please assemble nicely in front of the hall. Our class will be leaving shortly."

"I'll tell you later." I whispered to Bel as the teacher started taking attendance. She nodded eagerly.

After she finished taking attendance the class gathered outside of our homeroom. Slowly we made our way to the hall. I chatted with Bel and Cheren until we arrived. The 2nd years were allocated the middle section of the hall to sit. I sat there next to Bel and Cheren waiting for the assembly to start. The student council president walked up into the stage to give a speech.

"Now I would like to welcome a number of new staffs into our school." He called out on the microphone. "Would you please give a round of applause as the walk up onto the stage?" Everyone sat in silent anticipation as he began calling out the names.

"Miss Juri Marone. She will be working the science department and she will also be teacher Biology to the 1st years." The student council president said while smiling. A tall blonde woman walked onto the stage and waved to everyone. She appears to be in her mid-thirties. He continued to call out another few names; new teachers, new office assistants and school maintenance workers.

"And last but not least, N." He called out as N walked onto the stage. My eyes widened as I fixed my gaze upon him once again. The audience all let out a quiet murmur of awe, mostly the girls anyway. "He will be our school's new doctor, so if you're feeling sick come visit him in the infirmary."

I look intently at him. Who was he? Why do I feel so attracted to him? I mean sure he's very good looking and he seems nice but…I don't think that's it. There's something else. Really, I'm a person who doesn't believe in all this fate and destiny nonsense but still…I can't help but wonder if this encounter…is something like that. Is this what people call 'fate'? Or 'love at first sight'? Ugh well it feels quite weird to phrase it that way but I know I feel a kind of affiliation with him.

N waved at the crowd and smiled. He suddenly stopped waving and stared into the crowd with a slightly stunned face. What was he looking at? Until I realized that his eyes were facing straight him my direction. I stare back. Bel noticed that he was looking this way and turned her head to look at my face. She smiled a little gave me a little flick on the head.

"O-ouch, Bel what was that for?" I touched my forehead and growled at her.

"Haha, I was just trying to tell you to stop gawking at the teacher." She whispered into my ear.

"I-I wasn't gawking at him." I said feeling a little flustered. I looked back up at the stage but N was already walking back down. I couldn't help feeling that he was looking at me, that he found me out of this huge crowd. Impossible, I must be thinking rubbish.

When we returned to our usual school timetable I could not concentrate at all. I sat there at my window seat and stared outside…thinking. I don't know why I'm wasting my time but…I can't leave this feeling dormant. It feels as if my mind is going to shrivel up but…why am I feeling like this? I feel like I just want to jump onto him and hug him tightly the next time he comes into my range of sight. Is this a sign of insanity? I don't know, why can't I explain this emotion? I continue to stare out the window daydreaming. My heart feels very full but...it also feels very sick. It's a funny feeling. It's not like jealousy or heartbreak. I have no idea what it is. All I know is that I need to N again, even though love between a student and a teacher is forbidden...when I looked at him, he didn't seem like a teacher in my eyes.

"Touko, pay attention!" The teacher threw a chalk at my head and it was a critical hit.

"O-ouch, why do people keep hitting me today?" I mumbled to myself.

"Did you hear my lecture on the failed attempt of the Pokémon Liberation?" She glared at me.

"No. I wasn't paying attention. Sorry." I feigned an apology.

"Well 200 years an evil organization called Team Plasma tried to separate Pokémon and Humans. They called it the Pokémon Liberation but in reality it was an evil ploy by the Ghetis to obtain power." She stated. "N was his son but Ghetis only used him as a mere puppet for his evil ambitions. His son was deceived by his own father. However there was a young heroine who saved the world by defeating them. Historians say that she was just a normal girl who started her Pokémon journey not too long before the Liberation happened. It was incredible that she could obtain that much strength in a matter of months."

"They have the same name." I mumbled aloofly to myself. "How interesting."

"The heroine is long gone now but everyone will remember the savior that protected our world. You should be happy Touko since you have the same name as her." The teacher smiled as she closed her book. "Well that's it for today class; please complete the questions on page 35 in your textbook."

"It would be funny…if N and I were like the two central characters in the Pokémon Liberation." I smiled faintly to myself.


	2. Could This Be Fate?

**Could This Be Fate?**

That night while staring at my history text book I start to remember what the teacher said this morning. The legendary heroine who saved the world from despair, I wonder what kind of person she was. She sounds like a very genuine person. Suddenly feeling extremely interested in this great historical I jumped off my bed and hopped onto the computer. I don't know why but I've got this unexpected desire to learn more about this heroine and her journey. I went onto Google and typed in 'Pokémon Liberation Touko', a few sights popped up. I clicked on the most relevant looking one. My scan the computer screen thoroughly.

"She came from Nuvema town, a rural place south of the Unova region. She was only at 16 when she began her Pokémon journey….mmmm…..She battled….Plasma…um…" I read aloud to myself while trying to skip the information I already knew. "Oh this looks interesting, her personal life."

I stopped scrolling down and stopped at the heroine's personal life section. It said that she has two childhood friends that she started the journey but I wasn't really interested in that. I was wondering if she ever found love and such after she became the heroine. Hmmm it says that she never got married, I wonder if I can actually find a proper quote or maybe an interview or something. I went back onto the Google page and typed in 'personal life' as well. A few sites showed up. I clicked on the first one.

"Hmm….says that she did doesn't really remember her childhood crushes. Well isn't that boring?" I sighed a little but then the next sentence caught my eye. "However there was only one person I truly wanted to be with…but it was impossible."

What? Impossible? How come? It's not like she wanted to marry her brother or anything right, she didn't even have a brother. I continued to scroll down to find more interesting information. I started reading out loud again… because it's sort of like a habit of mine.

"He was very misunderstood but I knew he was a gentle person. I loved him very much and I'm sure he felt the same. However due to our circumstances we could never truly be together, but even so I felt very happy every time our paths would collide." I was glued to the screen. "We lived in different worlds; our relationship was already doomed from the start. If only we weren't on opposite sides then maybe something could've happened."

I continued to scan through the words but it didn't say who she was talking about. Who was the mysterious person that she dearly loved? Did she fall in love with the wrong man? Is this why she couldn't marry anyone else? Because she loved him and only him? Such a devoted person, how could anyone be so loyal? What was this? A kind of forbidden love? I kept trying to search for this mystery man that our heroine fell in love with but no matter which site I went on, there was no information on him. It just said how much she loved him and wanted to be with him. I sighed knowing that I couldn't find anything more so I left the computer and went to bed. Maybe I should ask our history teacher tomorrow about this?

*Next Day – History – After Class*

I packed up my books into a neat pile and waited until most of the students left the room. The teacher was still wiping off all of the notes from the lesson. I walked up to her slowly, feeling a little nervous I breathed in and out. It wasn't exactly the most normal question a student could ask a teacher.

"Um Miss?" I asked.

"Oh Touko, you're still here?" She turned around and stopped cleaning. "You need help with your homework?"

"No, not exactly." I smiled. "I just wanted to ask you a question about the heroine."

"Ah, it's great to see that you're interested in this topic." She beamed at me. "Well go on, ask away."

"I just wanted to know if the heroine ever loved anybody." I twiddled my thumbs in embarrassment but she just stared at me. "Y-you know like a boyfriend or lover."

"I see…well this won't be in your syllabus but I guess if you're interested I should tell you." She scratched her head a little in bewilderment. "Historians say that she didn't reveal her private life openly though."

"Yeah I was trying to find out yesterday but there was nothing on the internet." I said.

"I'm not surprised." She walked over to her desk and pulled out a textbook. "Well it was believed that she fell in love with the enemy."

"The enemy? Like a Team Plasma member?" I asked curiously.

"It's not confirmed but people assume that it was the leader of Team Plasma." She continued flicking through the pages without looking at me.

"Ghetis? Isn't he…a little old?" I asked feeling a little repulsed that the Great Touko had these preferences.

"Ahah no Touko it wasn't like that. Historians say that she was in love with his son." The teacher chuckled a bit at my response. "It appears that he also felt the same way."

"Oh I did read that it was a forbidden love…but I had no idea she fell in love with her greatest adversary." I commented interestedly.

"Yes well, it was never going to happen because they were on completely different sides. She even said that it was very hard for her to be with him sometimes. That her heart would feel like it's full of joy but ripping apart at the same time." She breathed out a small sigh. "It's quite sad really, a little bit like Romeo and Juliet of the Pokémon World."

"I see." I picked up my books quietly and bowed my head towards my teacher. "Thank you for giving up your time to explain it to me."

I headed out the door and ran down the corridor. I was going to be late for my next class; the Maths teacher never likes it when his students are late. I had to run past the infirmary on my way but I wanted to take a quick look before I go to class. I was already late so might as well. I started slowly down a little once I reached the infirmary door. I stood in front of it and placed my hand on the handle. I was contemplating whether to go in or not. I stood there thinking for a little while before I made up my mind. Okay here goes. I swung open the door and took a step forward…only to bang into someone and fall backwards; my books and papers went flying everywhere.

"O-ouch." I touched my forehead a little and then looked up at the figure that I walked into. It was N. "A-ah sorry. I should've looked at where I w-was going."

"No, it's my fault for bumping into you." He bent down and quickly tried to pick up my books.

"Teacher, you don't have to help me. Ah don't pick them all up by yourself." I exclaimed as I rapidly snatched away the remaining pieces of paper on the floor. He handed over my books carefully. "T-thank you."

"You're going to be late for class, if your teacher says anything tell him I held you up." N stood back up and offered his hand out to me. Without hesitating I took it. He pulled me up with ease. My heart started beating rapidly again. I couldn't help but stare at his face when he helped me up. It was as if I was naturally drawn to it. His jaw line is so defined…and his face looks very clean and smooth. What was this weird feeling? Love? Too soon I think…but even so how come I feel like crying right now? Tighten my grip on his hand involuntarily. This sentiment…it's like I'm scaling a glass barricade? A feeling of despondency. I noticed people looking at us from the corner of my eyes so I quickly let go of his hand and averted my eyes.

"Um well I better get going to class." I said trying to find an escape. "Bye."

"Ah right, then you should get going." He scratched his head a little and turned his face away from mine. It looked like he was also feeling embarrassed.

I bowed my head so low I felt like it almost hit the ground, and then I scurried off to my next class, leaving a confused teacher behind me. What was that? Every time I see him I feel really happy yet…sad. I wonder if this is just me, or maybe he feels the same way as well. I could possibly be thinking too much but still, this strange feeling isn't going away. I wonder if this is normal. Somehow I just want to monopolize him and keep him all to myself. How come I feel like I know everything about him but yet I feel as if we can never be together. I mean even though I'll graduate soon I sense that it's something that's beyond that barrier, something that's beyond the barrier of age and status. What was it? Should I try to get to know him more? Would that satisfy this unsettling force within me? I don't know if I should tell anyone about this…What should I do? This is bad; if this feeling keeps growing I think I might actually go insane. I can help but get this sense of helplessness when I'm near N, it's like I can see him but I can't reach him. Or like there's a thin invisible wall between us that is unbreakable. Upon arriving at the classroom I take my place next to Bel and take out my books. She seems happy as always.

"Hi, Touko." She grinned merrily. "I haven't seen you all day."

"You saw me this morning while we were walking to school." I sighed a little and smiled.

"Oh yeah." She giggled at her realization. "Well why are you a little late? I mean the teacher isn't here yet but I noticed."

"Um I just…bumped into N that's all." I tried to hide my rosy cheeks.

"Oooooh you're already calling him by his first name?" She asked cheekily. "What a fast development, you move fast Touko."

"W-wha? N-no it's not like that!" I exclaimed in embarrassment, I didn't even realize that I said his first name.

"Come on, did something happen?" Bel crept a little closer to me and placed her ear near my face as if I was going to tell her some top secret organization plan.

"No! Nothing happened between us!" I screamed. All the heads within the classroom turned and looked at me. I banged my head on the table in embarrassment.

"U-um sorry Touko. I didn't know you were sensitive about it." Bel apologized and then returned to her seat.

"Geez, why is it always you making all the noise Touko?" Cheren tapped his left ear a little as he walked towards my desk. "Really, is this about the new doctor again?"

"Wow, Cheren you're so smart. How did you know?" Bel asked in awe.

"Ugh it's not that hard to guess." Cheren sighed and took his seat in front of me. "Why are you so hung up by that teacher anyway?"

"I don't know." I answered truthfully.

"What do you mean you don't know?" Cheren cringed at my answer.

"I get this weird feeling when I look at him." I started to talk without even realizing what I was saying. "It's kind of like…I've seen him before, no more than that. It's like I had a strong connection with him…but I've never met him."

"Could this be love at first sight?" Bel clasped her cheeks with the palm of her hands. "Or even fate?"

"Maybe…"I breathed out a small sigh.


	3. What Are You To Me?

**What Are You To Me?**

I sat in maths class staring blankly at the computer board. I mean if they could make complicated computer white boards then why can't they make maths more fun? Even though the technology is advancing dramatically, maths is same old same old. I mean it's nearly 2211, why is Accumula town so backwards, maybe because this place is so rural and secluded from the rest of Unova. I mean the Ferris wheel in Nimbus City can basically fly now. Well I guess it's not too bad living in a vintage sort of town, I mean we have Pokémon why would we need hover cars anyway? Actually now that I think about it…does anyone in the Unova region drive a car? Strange…

Anyway I stopped thinking about trivial matters and laid my head down onto my desk. I was tired. I didn't really want to learn about normal distribution and all that. The teacher stopped his lesson and walked towards me.

"Is my lesson boring you Miss Touko?" He crossed his arms and glared at me disapprovingly.

"No, sir. I'm just feeling a little tired." I put on my best weary voice.

"Is that so? Do you want to go to the infirmary then?" He asked in an unsympathetic tone.

"The infirmary?" I shot my head back up.

"Yes…the infirmary. You know…the room where sick students go to rest?" He gave me a weird look.

"A-ah no, I'll be fine." I laughed a little and picked up my pen.

"If you say so." He shrugged and returned to teaching.

***After Class***

"Hey Touko, why were you so shocked about going to the infirmary?" Bel asked curiously as we walked towards the cafeteria.

"Ah, well it's just that…N's there and so…yeah." I found it hard to think of an explanation.

"Ahaha you're acting very strange, you know?" She smiled. "Anyway let's go get something to eat; it'll probably make you feel better."

We walked into the cafeteria. The soft scent of hot food filled the air. They had just remodeled the cafeteria lately; it was because this school didn't want to feel too out of date. The room was a blinding shade of white, the old steel tables and benches were replaced with floating ones. It was easier to move the tables and lock them in place; there was also more room for each person's feet. I liked it; I thought it was very innovative. It must've cost the school a fortune since they looked very expensive. Bel and I went to go buy some food at the counter. We both chose to eat the berry salad; we wanted a light meal today. We walked and sat down at a spare table in the middle of the room.

"I wonder where all the teachers get their food from." Bel asked randomly. "Aha I never see them in the cafeteria."

"They probably have their own special one somewhere in the school." I jokingly answered.

Just as I said that a loud avalanche of squeals shot up from behind me. I turned around to see what the problem was, did the school idol Touya appear or something? I noticed that there was a mob of female students surrounding the entrance of the cafeteria. I couldn't see a thing, not with that thick mist of girls hanging around there.

"Should we go check it out?" I asked Bel curiously.

"Awww but I really wanna eat this." She whined a little, which means a no. I nodded in defeat and obediently turned around to eat my salad. However as soon as I was going to put a fork-full in my mouth a huge a handful of girls stampeded past our table…making my drop all of my salad on the floor.

I stared in disbelief at my 'lunch'.

"AH! My food!" I exclaimed. I quickly flashed my head around to complain at the hoard of screaming fan girls. "Hey!"

As I got up from my seat, I walked towards the huge crowd of squealing girls. I tapped the one that knocked my food over on the shoulder. She just ignored me and continued to try and drill her way into the front of the crowd. I was annoyed at this point. Just as I was about to reach for her again she managed to push through successfully. Oh no, this bitch isn't getting away that easily. I slammed my head into the hoard and tried to chisel my way in. Using my arms as drills I managed to get to the front but so many girls were pushing, I couldn't stand it.

"U-ugh stop pushing so hard." I struggled to get out of the circle. I wriggled around in one spot until I managed to shove my way out. I could finally breathe. The force pushing me out was so strong that I lost balance and fell on top of someone. "O-ouch, sorry about that."

The screaming suddenly went silent. No more squealing or pushing. There was only silence. I looked up and around me; they were all forming a huge circle around me. I stare up in confusion.

"Hey Touko, would you mind getting off our beloved En-En." They scowled.

"Huh? What?" I turn to look down at the figure beneath me. It was N. He was half smiling at me. I looked even lower, past his face. I was sitting right on top of him and not in an appropriate way either. No, it was in the type of way with my legs astride, and with my buttocks placed directly above his you-know-what. It was definitely a sight to behold. I bet the girls were hacking me with a chainsaw in their minds. To make matters worse I was gripping onto his shirt as I fell, making the buttons fall off on impact. So there he was beneath me and half naked. My face blushed madly as I realized the position that we were in. I clumsily jumped right off him and steadied myself.

"Ahaha are you hurt any where?" He got off the floor and dusted his pants a little.

"N-no, I'm fine but I'm REALLY sorry about that." I bowed my head at him in shame. "Sorry, sorry. I d-didn't mean to."

"No, it's alright. Don't apologize." He smiled gently at me.

"En-En, why are you being so nice to her?" One of the girls bounced out of the group and clung to his arm. "You're being too friendly with her."

"U-um…" N tried to distance himself from the girl, but it was a futile effort.

"Come on, let's go get some lunch for you." They group dragged him into the cafeteria as I looked on in disbelief. He turned his head around and gave an apologetic smile. However his eyes to me looked as if he wanted to remain over on this side…maybe it was just my imagination.

"Wow…girls can be so scary." I sighed a little in amusement. "But they didn't have to crowd around him like that."

"Jealousy?" A voice popped out from behind me.

"Uwahh!" I jumped. I turned around in shock to find Cheren smirking at my reaction.

"Haha didn't think you were that spaced out." A repressed chuckle escaped his mouth.

"Cheren! I wasn't spaced out and I WASN'T jealous." I yelled. That was a lie.

"Really now…then I won't need to comfort you." He pats me on the head lightly as he walked past me. Somehow Cheren has the weirdest way of trying to cheer people up. I smile a little at his effort.

"I don't really want to go back and eat now." I sighed. "Maybe I'll just go somewhere to rest…the garden? The classroom? No those are so impractical. I'll just head to the infirmary."

I dragged my feet across the floor towards the door. I slowly made my way across to the 2nd building and up the stairs. This was a very long journey…even though I was only going to the infirmary which was less than 5 minutes away. I weakly opened the door and went in, I shut it lightly behind me. No one was inside. Well at least it's peaceful. I tried to find a find a comfortable looking bed…even though they were all the same type. I pushed a button that released an opaque electronic curtain behind me once I found one I liked; taking off my shoes I climbed onto the bed lethargically. I lied face up towards the ceiling. All I could hear was silence. I turned to my side and closed my eyes gently. It was so peaceful in here I feel like I could doze off for hours.

***4 hours later***

"Uwaaaa~" I yawned as I sat up. I gave myself a good stretch as I sleepily looked around the room. It was a nice dark shade of orange….wait. Dark shade of orange? Suddenly realizing that it was not longer lunch I flung up quickly and jumped off the bed. While awkwardly putting my shoes on I dashed towards the curtains only to forget that they're electronic and are solid. I bumped my forehead on it, while feeling stupid I pushed the button to retract the curtains and ran out.

"Oh, you've awaken." A voice called out from behind me as I was about to open the door. I turned around slowly. It was N. It shouldn't be a surprise to me since he works here but still...

"Ah! N, how long were you here? Why aren't you going home?" I asked frantically.

"Well I couldn't leave a sick person lying here by themselves and I can't possibly bring myself to wake them up." He laughed a little.

"What? So you waited for me?" I was in shock. I glance at the clock to see what time it was, it was a little past 5.

"Don't worry, it's not like I have anything important to do but you sure sleep for a long time." He smiled.

"A-ah yeah…" I didn't know what else to say.

"It's going to get dark soon. Do you want me to take you home?" He asked.

"N-no, that won't be necessary!" I basically shouted at him. I turned around quickly and walked out of the door…or so I thought. I had forgotten to open it. I flung back in pain and covered my forehead. "O-ouch"

"Ahaha, that was quite a bump." He laughed. "I probably should've told you that you hadn't opened the door yet."

"W-what? You knew it wasn't opened yet you let me walk straight into it?" I complained.

"Sorry, but anyway let me have a look at the wound. It's going to swell very soon." N stood up from his desk and went to retrieve something from the medicine cabinet.

"Um…okay." I couldn't say no. So I walked over to the stool next to his desk and sat down. He came back with a few funny looking gadgets.

"Alright lift up your head." He held up a flash light looking device. "It'll be better to close your eyes because this is bright."

I closed my eyes as he instructed and lifted my head up. I waited to him to scan the bump to see if it was okay. I've felt one of things before, mum uses on me all the time…I don't know what it's called though. The light is supposed to feel warm or even a little hot and it should last for about 3 seconds. I sit there patiently waiting…waiting….waiting…and waiting? I peaked open one eye to see what was taking so long…but N was just kneeling there.

"Um…is everything okay?" I asked nervously.

"Huh?...Ah! Yes it's fine!" He snapped out of his trance as he switched on the device. "W-well nothing seems to be wrong. I'll just add some liniment so your skin won't feel irritated." I felt a little anxious since there were only us two in the room. It was almost like a scene from a movie. N held up a tube of ointment and placed some on his finger tips. The ointment was stinging my eyes a little so I closed them. N carefully smeared a little bit of it on my forehead in a slow circular motion. His fingers felt very warm but a little rough; it was a man's hand. However I could tell from the motion that he was trying his best to be gentle. I opened my eyes after he was finished.

"N…" I unconsciously called.

"Touko…" He said almost inaudibly. His palm and fingers slid down from my forehead to my cheeks; it felt very hot.

"What are you…to me?" We asked simultaneously.


	4. Why Do You Need To Know So Much?

**Why Do You Need To Know So Much?**

We sat there in silence but…it wasn't an awkward silence. The stillness was peaceful and almost nostalgic. I carefully looked at his face…I really don't recognize him at all. I have no idea where I have met this man before but…I must have connection with him. What is it though? The more I think about it the more it confuses me. I wonder if he feels the same. Maybe he just stands out too much with his long green hair, maybe I've just pasted him in town once or something….No, I don't think that's it. It's something else but I can't quite put my finger to it. My train of thoughts was suddenly interrupted when he hurled his hand off me.

"S-sorry." He said in a flustered voice as he picked up the tools off the ground. "U-um you should probably go home now."

"H-huh? Yeah I should. I'm going to go home and feed my Tepig now. Bye!" I quickly stood up and ran out the door.

"Huh… a Tepig?"

I dashed out of the building as quickly as I could. It was still a little bright so I should be able to get home fine. I made my way past the numerous houses and the Pokémon centre. I turned a corner and went down a flight of steps. I unlocked the door, went in and slammed it shut. I laid my back on it and breathed heavily. I felt so tired and embarrassed. My knees sort of collapsed under me as I slide down towards the floor.

"Hmm Touko? Why are you sitting in a place like that?" My mum asked as she spotted me in front of the door.

"It's nothing I'm just a little tired." I laughed as I got up. "I'm going to go to my room now."

I quickly ran past her and into my room. I could still feel my heart racing like a jet ski. Somehow I ran to my computer and turned it on in haste. I sat there as I waited for it to load…it seemed like a lifetime. I opened up the internet browser and began typing 'Pokemon Liberation Touko N'. I clicked enter. There were a lot of sites that popped up but however when I read the description they all seemed to be bad. They all said that N was her enemy and that's all. This was not going to help me find the information I needed. Maybe if I search for each of them individually it'll work. I've already searched up Touko so this time I'll search up N. I retyped my statement by getting rid of the word Touko…that made me feel a little uncomfortable for some reason. I clicked on the first site that popped up. It seemed to be an interview with some of the Team Plasma Members.

"Hmph our Leader N was a freak; he was too childish and innocent. He wasn't fit to be a leader. He has a room filled with toys and he's a grown man. That is just weird. What's even weirder is that he thinks he can talk to Pokémon." I read out loud. Shocked at what the grunt had to say I scroll down to find more information. "He was a nice guy…too nice, I felt kind of sorry for him. I heard Anthea say that he was never exposed to people."

Interesting…I've never heard of this information before. It seems that N wasn't as cold-hearted as people say he was…and he was rumored to be the heroine's lover. I kept trying to find more hard evidence about N and his life. I continued to go onto different websites; one could say that I was half obsessed. I found some more quotes and read them aloud to myself.

"He really did want a better word for the Pokémon, he had good intentions but too bad he couldn't fulfill them. He really did care for Pokémon I guess. I have no idea where he went after Team Plasma disbanded." I found another quote from another member and read that out too. "I think he was probably mistreated as a kid, I mean there's no way a normal person would've turned out like that…or maybe I've just misunderstood."

From what I've gather here is…that N doesn't seem like a bad person even though he was on Team Plasma. It was more like this was a game and the heroin and he just happen to be on different teams. I wonder what his childhood was like; from the look of the information here it doesn't seem like a very good one. It's kind of sad now that I think about it. A couple that is fated never to be.

I stopped researching after that and just carried on with my normal home life; doing homework, family, eating, playing with Tepig, sleeping.

***Next Morning – School***

I yawned casually as I walked into the school gates. It was a pleasant morning actually. I waved back emptily to the number of faces that greeted me. These days I couldn't care less about keeping up an image or being friendly when I don't feel like it. I wonder why? Maybe it's because I've been so preoccupied with this whole 'Heroine and N' thing. Geez, ever since he showed up here I've been all messed up…this really isn't good for me. I'm a model student; I shouldn't be acting this way.

"Toukoooo~" A voice called out from behind me. I turned around to find Bel gracefully running towards me.

"Bel." I smiled genuinely.

"Ahaha, hey Touko." She laughed as she caught up with me. "Where were you yesterday? You just disappeared after lunch."

"Oh…I was just feeling a little unwell so I slept in the infirmary for a little while." I laughed as I walked next to her towards the school building.

"Really? I didn't see you after school either." She asked curiously.

"Ah yeah, I slept till about 5." I averted my eyes a little.

"Wow! That's so late, you're such a slob." She giggled as she patted my back. "Anyway you're feeling better now so let's hurry up." We both ran quickly towards our homeroom as the siren went off.

Bel sort of turned it into a race as she sped past me, she turned around a pulled her tongue at me. Like hell I'm going to let her win. I picked up the paste as I sharply turned a corner towards the infirmary. I leapt outwards after I turned…only to pounce on someone. It appeared to be N…why I am I always getting myself into these situations? Really…does God hate me that much? I can't take any more of these embarrassing situations. I should really just dig and hole and sit in there.

"I'm sorry! Are you alright?" I quickly stood up and grabbed his arm to help him get off the ground.

"I'm perfectly fine." He smiled lightly. "But I don't think your Tepig is."

"Huh?" I looked at him with a confused face until I turned to my right to find Tepig sticking out of my bag with a dizzy expression. "Kyaaa! What are you doing her Tepig? I'm going to get in trouble, this isn't a Pokémon school. It's a high school."

"Ahaha don't get angry at him, he probably just wanted to spend the day with you." N smiled genuinely at my confused little piggy lying on the floor. He went over and picked him up. "That's quite a bump little guy."

"He's not badly hurt right?" I asked feeling a little concerned.

"It doesn't seem that way; I'll just give him a quick check up." N patted Tepig's head a little.

"Alright then I'll leave him your care." I smiled while I picked up my bag. "I'll pick him up after class. Bye now."

I ran with full speed towards my classroom. I'm most definitely late now. I slammed open the door and bowed my head.

"I'm sorry I'm late!" I exclaimed as I stood in front of the door.

"Whatever. Just take your seat." Cheren nonchalantly called out. "Our teacher's not even here yet."

I blushed slightly at the humiliation but went and sat at my seat. The first two periods seem to go really slowly…maybe it was because I really wanted to go see N. I'd hate to admit it but I really want to see him. I don't know why but I just do…so every single passing minute seems like a lifetime. I stared at the clock in agony as the second hand doesn't seem to be moving at all. I tried my best to pay attention during class…but when you have this think lump of lead stuck in your chest it's not going to happen. My prayers were answered after the recess bell rang. I hurriedly packed up my books and ran out the door ignoring every single greeting people throw at me. I sprinted in the direction of the infirmary and opened the door swiftly.

"Oh Touko, you're here already that's early." N looked over at me in surprise.

"U-um… I was just worried about Tepig." I half lied.

"Is that so? You're quite a nice person then." He smiled. "Well Tepig seems to be fine."

"Really? That's a relief." I breathed out a sigh and walked over to the examination table. What a table like that is doing in an infirmary I don't know. "How are you feeling little guy?"

"He seems to really like you." N smiled as he petted Tepig. "And you've only known him for a short while too."

"Yeah it's amazing really…wait. How did you know I got him recently?" I asked.

"A-ah, it shows when I examined him, little bits and pieces really." N avoided my eyes for a minute.

"I see. Well its good thing you're alright huh?" I ignored the N's awkwardness just then and petted Tepig. "But why'd you sneak into my bad like that?"

"He says that he just wanted to see your school." N answered in a gentle tone.

"Ahaha pretending that you know what he's thinking, you're funny Mr N." I laughed a little. Strange…wasn't the 'N' from the Pokemon Liberation like that? Couldn't he communicate with them?

"A-aha-ha-ha…that I am." N laughed halfheartedly. "Anyway learn how to take better care of your friend. It's such a shame to see them get hurt."

"Um why didn't you become a doctor specializing in Pokémon? It just seems that you really love them…maybe even more than people." I was half serious when I said this,

"Hmm…that I don't know." N started to ponder a little bit. "Now that you mention it…I probably should've become something like that."

"Well the fact that you know how to help both people and Pokémon is pretty amazing." I smiled at him. "Do you have Pokémon of your own?"

"U-um yes I do actually…but I hardly ever make them battle." N looked at the wall in front of him. "I just hate it when I see them get hurt. That's all a Pokémon battle is; my friends getting hurt."

"You must care for them a lot." I commented. However how come it feels like I'm experiencing déjà vu?

"Yeah that's true, they're very important to me. That's why I hate it when people mistreat their Pokémon." N commented but his tone seems a little darker now. "I've always wondered…wouldn't they all be a lot happier if some of them weren't with humans."

I felt a little anxious and concerned now. Not because he was acting strange but because he was acting a lot like the 'N' from 200 years ago. Maybe it was just my imagination but I want to try asking him something else.

"If you don't mind me asking…but are you not very good with people?"

"You're right. I'm not. That's why I felt uncomfortable when all those high school girls started surrounding me. Somehow I'm not use too that sort of affection."

"I see. Then what do you think about toys?"

"I think they're great, they resemble childhood innocence. Anyone who plays with them must be very pure."

"Is that so? Then what do you feel when you look at me?"

"…Why do you need to know so much?"


	5. What Is This Strange Feeling?

**What Is This Strange Feeling?**

"Why do you need to know so much?" He repeated.

"What?" I asked in shock.

"Why do you want to know so much about me?" N looked directly into my eyes.

"U-um, there's really no reason…" I quickly looked away and changed the subject. "Well Tepig seems fine; I'm just going to go now."

"Then let me ask you something since I also have the right to know." He spoke before I could open the door. "Do you have a dream?"

"A dream?" I turned around feeling a little bit confused. "…Have you asked me that question before?"

"No I haven't." He replied bluntly.

"O-oh…then I guess I do." Strange…I swear I've heard someone say the same thing to me before.

"Well then. That's good." N smiled at me as he returned back to his work. I looked at him as he turned away from me and continued to shuffle through some papers. I quickly opened the door and left. As I entered the corridor I see Cheren and Bel walking towards me. They gave each other a weird look and then ran to my side; Bel beaming with glee while Cheren crossed his arm in disapproval.

"Ehehe. Did you go see him again today?" She smiled.

"Really Touko, you said you'd be able to control yourself." Cheren sighed and pushed his glasses up.

"Come on guys, don't misunderstand. I was only in there because Tepig snuck into the school and then got hurt." I showed them by returning Tepig into his Poke ball. It seems that neither of them had even noticed Tepig in my arms.

"Oh…well that's a valid reason." Cheren commented. "Anyway you spent a quite a lot of time in there; it's almost time for our next class."

"Hehe we came to pick you up." Bel grabbed my hand and started pulling me towards the classroom.

"H-hey can I ask you guys something?" I stammered. "It may sound like a stupid question though…"

"Well one gains knowledge from asking after all." Cheren stated. "I don't see any harm in it. Very well, ask away."

"Do you guys believe in rebirth?" I asked hesitantly.

"Huh? Come again?" Bel cocked her head to the side a little.

"U-um like being reborn…but as the same person but with like…I don't know…different circumstances." I stammered.

"Ahaha what the heck Touko? You can be really weird sometimes." Bel laughed genuinely.

"I don't really believe in all that superstitious nonsense." Cheren pushed his glasses up again. "But that's an interesting question to ask. Did something happen?"

"Aha-ha-ahaa…No it's nothing really. I was wondering that's all." I explained weakly.

"Behind every 'I wonder' there is a reason." Cheren commented nonchalantly. "Well whatever it is, it's probably not important."

"Well I guess it'd be cool if we were reborn again don't you think?" Bel asked lightly.

"Bel, don't let your mind wonder from your studies." Cheren decreed.

"Geez Cheren lighten up a little." She smiled. "If it was true, like would we forget everything in our past life; family, friends, lovers?"

"Okay that's enough, let's just head to class." Cheren commanded as he dragged both of us to class.

***Lunch***

After another two periods of unbearable torture I headed towards the infirmary. It's strange, I used to really love going to class but now every second seems like a thousand years. Also why do I keep wanting to go to the infirmary? It's not as if I'm sick…then I guess there's only one explanation. I probably have a crush on N or something…or maybe I'm just so curious about this whole 'being reborn' thing. I don't know but I need to think of an excuse to visit him again. What should I say? I have a stomach ache? Or maybe a headache? I need to pick up medicine for a friend? I hesitantly opened the door to the infirmary and walked in.

"Hello? Is anyone here?" I asked. N looked up from his desk.

"Oh you're here again huh?" He chuckled lightly as if the awkward conversation we had two periods ago never happened. "What's wrong this time?"

"I just wanted to… get some band-aids for a friend." I lied.

"Sure, just let me get them for you." N got up from his chair and put down his magazine. He walked over to the draw and took out a few band-aids. While he was getting them ready I strolled to his desk. I glanced down at the magazine and saw a glimpse of the title 'Nimbas City'.

"Oh wow, you're interested in going to this city?" I asked excitedly.

"Hmm? Ah..yes I suppose you could say that." He went over to me and gave the band-aids. "I was interested in the Ferris wheel."

"Ferris wheel?" I asked curiously.

"I've always wanted to ride it since I was a child." He looked at the photo of the Ferris wheel with eyes filled with longing. "Even though it's been there for a while already they've fixed it up pretty nicely."

"I see." I smiled a little at his innocent thoughts. Somehow I wasn't very surprised when he said he was fascinated with the Ferris wheel. Why is that? Maybe it's just because that attraction is so popular…I probably shouldn't look too much into it. "I hear the Pokémon Musicals are also quite popular."

"I'm not very fond of the musicals." He said in a low voice. "All it is is Pokémon being forced to dress up weirdly and dance for the enjoyment of humans."

"A-ah sorry." I tried to find something else to talk about. That's when I noticed a strange looking cube lying on his desk. "Oh this is an unusual object. What is it?"

"My menger sponge?" He asked. "It's just something I carry around from time to time."

"I see." I pick it up and carefully look at it. "Hmmm…have I seen this somewhere before?" I don't recall seeing this shape in maths though…Strange. Where have I seen this? I feel as if I've encountered this thing many times but where? Have I seen it on a TV commercial or maybe it was a toy I saw when shopping? Nevertheless…this thing has entered my field of vision before today.

"Ahem. Anyway is there else you need?" He asked me lightly.

"No but…can I ask you something else?" I shuffled my feet a little.

"Is it about school?" He laughed.

"Not exactly." I tried to fake a laugh. "I was wondering if you believed….in being reborn."

"Hmm?" N looked at me in a strange way.

"N-never mind! That was a silly question. I'll be going now." I bowed my head and then swiftly ran out the door. "Bye!"

I quickly made my way towards the cafeteria where I knew Bel and Cheren would be sitting. They always eat there and always at the same table as well. I glance around trying to find them; Cheren was sitting down while Bel was still in line. I ran over to Cheren and sat next to him. He jumped a little. Cheren rapidly turned towards me with a surprised look; I guess he was still shocked.

"W-whoa! Don't sneak up on people like that." He commanded with a surprised voice. "And what are those band-aids for? Did you fall again?"

"No I just went to get them cause I felt like it." I smiled casually and waved at Bel who was now walking over.

"Touko, how nice of you to join us." Bel smiled at me while sitting down.

"Yeah sorry I haven't been available for a few days' guys." I chuckled. "Hey why don't we go shopping to make up for lost time?"

"Really?" Bel beamed.

"Of course, it'll be fun." I smiled back. Actually this was a lie…I just wanted something to take my mind off N for a while. All this trying to research about the past is really doing my head in. "Cheren you'll be coming too right?"

"I guess there's no harm in going." He sighed but I could see it was a happy sigh.

"Yay! We haven't hung out in so long." Bel clapped her hands in joy. "Let's go right after school."

***After School***

We walked over to the shopping centre since it was so close to school. My mum said that we were really lucky to even have a shopping centre that sells clothes and such because back in her days she didn't have that luxury. Even when grandma was alive the only stores they had in Accumula Town was the Pokémon centre and that was only for Pokémon supplies. We entered the shopping arcade and decided to go buy clothes first. Bel and I tried on numerous clothes and asked for Cheren's opinions; he looked quite annoyed but we didn't really care. After buying a few pieces we walked past a sports shop. I never really visit these often when shopping for clothes because they're not really my style. I looked through the display window and saw a mannequin wearing some exercise gear. She was in a pair of blue shorts and a white singlet. I was about to turn around and keep moving until I spotted her hat. It was a pink and white baseball cap with a poke ball symbol on the front. I was immediately drawn to it. Bel noticed me gazing at the cap.

"Hmm? Do you like it? It's not really your usual style though." She jokingly commented.

"I know but…" I didn't understand why I wanted to buy it so badly. "I'm going to buy it."

I quickly entered the store and asked the clerk if I could purchase the cap. He gave it to me with a discount of 200 poke dollars because I was 'cute'. I ran outside and showed Cheren and Bel my new purchase.

"Well it's cute but…I never thought you'd wear something like that." Cheren commented.

"It doesn't stand out very much but somehow I like it. I think it'll suit you even if you don't wear stuff like this often." Bel smiled at me.

"Yeah…I don't know why but when I saw it…I felt some kind of connection with it?" I tried sounding serious.

"Ahaha what the heck Touko?" Bel laughed. "What a funny way of saying you like it."

I wasn't lying though. When I saw it…it just sort of clicked. I knew I had to buy it right away. Somehow I felt that if I had that on my head I'll feel complete. It's stupid I know. I don't really know how to describe this feeling but it's like I've owned it before and then I lost it. Then I found it again so now I'm ecstatic to have to have it back. I have never seen this in my life yet I feel like I've worn it for years. Does clothing really have that effect on people? Wow…this is getting strange. Why do I keep feeling funny emotions when I see a particular object or person? Darn, I need to know more about this.

"I need to know more." I muttered under my breath while walking next to Cheren and Bel.

"Hmm? Did you say something?" Cheren asked.

"Ahaha not really, I was just talking to myself." I laughed a little. "Hey you guys wanna see what I look like with this on?"

"Sure!" Bel gave me a look of anticipation as I placed the cap on my head. "Wow it looks good but…have I seen you wearing that somewhere before?"

"Don't think so." I cocked my head to the side a little.

"Come on let's go find a mirror. Maybe you'll remember because I swear I've seen you wear something like this." Bel took my hand and guided me into a store to find a mirror. There I looked at myself wearing the hat. She was right. How come I feel as if I've worn this before?

"What is this strange feeling?" I murmured to myself.


	6. What Can I Do To Make It Stop?

**What Can I Do To Make It Stop?**

_NB: I don't want to call him or whatever because that sounds weird. Also calling him N and him being a teacher seems kind of rude so I'll be referring to N as 'Sensei' for some parts. For those who don't know 'Sensei' is teacher in Japanese._

"Come on let's go find a mirror. Maybe you'll remember because I swear I've seen you wear something like this." Bel took my hand and guided me into a store to find a mirror. There I looked at myself wearing the hat. She was right. How come I feel as if I've worn this before?

"What is this strange feeling?" I murmured to myself. What can I do to make these bizarre feelings stop?

"See! Haven't you worn this somewhere before?" Bel asked excitedly.

"U-ugh yeah…somewhere." I smiled back.

"I knew it, my memory is as good as always." She laughed.

"Anyway it's just a hat so let's not make a big deal out of it." I casually dismissed her enthusiasm. "Well it was great hanging out with you guys…I…ugh gotta head on home now…so then I guess I'll see you guys tomorrow."

I wave good-bye to both of them as I made my way home. As I walked past the houses I didn't even realize I still had my hat on, it must've looked pretty weird to some people; wearing a baseball cap with a school uniform that is. As I was about to turn the corner to head down my street I saw a glimpse of what I thought was N from the corner of my eye. I turned over to find that it was him but…he was staring at me and intently too. Did I have something on my face? Maybe the hat looked really out of place. Feeling a little bit awkward and uncomfortable I decided to go over and greet him.

"Um hi." I managed to smile gracefully. 'What are you doing here Sensei?"

"Ah my house…is near here…so I'm just walking home." He spoke fairly slowly. "But rather than that…why are you wearing that hat?"

"Um I bought it today but I forgot to take it off." I laughed a little and looked down. I must look so weird right now.

"I see." N turned his face away from me for a second.

"Um…is it strange? You've been looking at it for quite some time." I questioned feeling a little bit self conscious.

"No, no weird but now like I sense a little bit of nostalgia. Strange because you just bought this today." N stared intently at the cap, it was as if he was trying to remember something he forgot long ago. "In any case it's getting late you should head home."

"U-um okay then, see you tomorrow Sensei." I smiled and turned around to run home.

"Bye now. Be safe." He waved lightly as I turned around.

I quickly made my way back to the house…for some reason I felt really hot. I could've sworn the weather was fairly cool just a minute ago. Unless this is my body heat acting up? It couldn't be! Not again. Why am I getting all hot and blushy for this guy? He's just my teacher…My extremely kind, attractive and sexy teacher. Wait, what? I did not just think that? I did not just think that he was drop dead gorgeous (even though he is). Aghh! What's wrong with me? Just because of a little déjà vu I start to act weird? What can I do to make these strange thoughts disappear? This is not me. I am a strong, cheerful and independent young woman. I am not some lovey-dovey teenager who gets smitten with every good-looking man I see. I slammed open the front door and shut it loudly behind me.

"Ah Touko. I've just started cooking dinner. Do you want to hel-" Her request fell on deaf ears as I quickly shut my bedroom door. "Okay then…"

"Ah! What's wrong with me? Why have I been so weird these last few days?" I dropped my bag and jumped onto my plushie Tepig. I started squeezing it tightly and rolling around frantically on my bed. I flung up to take a look in the mirror when I had realized that I still had my cap on.

"Ahh! He also saw me wearing this with my uniform! I must've looked so weird." I took the cap off and threw it in a blushing fit onto the floor. "Wahh! I'm over reacting, it's okay. It's perfectly fine."

"Toukooo! Come down and help with dinner." My mum yelled.

"Mum! I'm having a crisis right now!" I exclaimed and then continued to bury my face within my plushie.

***The Next Day***

I quietly tip-toed past the infirmary and into my classroom. I didn't want to draw any attention to myself and I especially didn't want Sensei to see. I don't know why but I suddenly feel that it's going to be really awkward between us now. Maybe it's just me but whatever.

"Touko~" Bel called out from the back of the classroom. "What are you doing? Trying to draw attention to yourself? And so early in the day too."

"No…quite the opposite actually." I face palmed myself.

"Ahaha really?" Bel laughed nonchalantly. "Oh by the way I think a new nurse is coming in today."

"WHAT?" I basically screamed. "U-ugh I mean…continue."

"Well I hear she's a real beauty and that she's quite young as well." Bel tapped her index finger on her chin. "She apparently knows N Sensei very well too… I think they grew up together."

"It surprises me how someone like you can get a hold of such information." Cheren walked up to us and adjusted his glasses casually. "It's true Touko, believe her."

"Yup and I think they'll both be working together. You know just in case one of them is away or something." Bel smiled.

"T-then what is this new teacher's name?" I asked curiously. "You know, just to make sure."

"Right." Cheren sarcastically smirked at me. "I think her name was Concordia. Strange name, I take it that she must a foreign."

"I see." I almost collapsed when I heard this. My Sensei will be spending more time with another woman. Huh? What? Now he's _MY_ Sensei is he? Is he my property now? What's wrong with my thinking? I need to stop thinking like this? How can I make these thoughts stop popping up?

"Well I don't think they'll be a formal assembly just for her but they'll definitely announce it somewhere." Cheren continued. He then looked over at me and smirked a little. "Don't worry. The whole female student body will be irritated too."

"I am not irritated. Geez Cheren I'm not that kind of person." I defended myself.

"Alright, whatever you say." He laughed a little and went to take his seat.

"It's okay Touko, if you try your best I'm sure that smoking new teacher won't be able to steal him away from you." Bel tried to encourage me.

"You're not helping." I exclaimed and whined at the same time.

"I know why don't we pay a little visit after class? Then you'll be able to see what your competition is." Bel smiled.

"But I go there too often; he'll think I'm weird." I complained.

"Well it's not like he's the epitome of normal either." Bel laughed coolly.

"Geez, you're really evil deep down you know that?" I sighed a little and then smiled.

***After Class***

I packed up my books quickly and waited to Bel to hurry up with her stuff too. She shuffled through her papers clumsily while constantly apologizing to me at the same time.

"Come on, wasn't this your idea?" I shook her by the shoulders a little.

"Yes I know, I'm sorry but I'm not the one in love with my teacher. I shouldn't be in a hurry." She continued to pack up her books.

"W-what? I'm not in love with him!" She retorted.

"Touko. You go to his office every single day and you're constantly talking about him. You can't even say his name without smiling." She chortled.

"That is not true. N." I could feel the sides of my lips moving slightly up, I quickly covered my mouth with the palms of my hands.

"See?" Bel finished packing up and tapped me on the shoulders. "Anyway shall we go?"

I followed her as we made our way towards the infirmary. I was usually the domineering one but today it seems that all of my confidence has drained out of me. I could only tag along after Bel as she leads the way. Thank God I have understanding friends like her. People who can understand that I am not always confident and strong. I can also be very weak and self conscious. Bel then opens the door to the infirmary as I stand behind her. I peer past her shoulders to see Sensei sitting at his desk…with a stunningly beautiful woman sitting on it. Her hair was long and golden like silky threads, her body was voluptuous and slender like something out of a magazine, and her face was pretty and feminine like a princess. Bel took one look and then closed the door.

"WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?" I cried out.

"Ehehe I looked a portrait from another world, so I felt out of place. Sorry." She scratched her head innocently.

"What?" I retorted.

"Didn't you see them though?" Bel asked lightly. "It was as if looking at a Prince and a Princess. They seemed almost superior to everyone."

"Y-yeah. I guess you do have a point." I hung my head low in discouragement.

"Ah! B-but you're also very cute Touko." She tried cheering me up. "So who cares if she's been with him longer or if she looks like a living doll? You're younger than her and…youth is everything."

"Please just be quiet Bel, every word you're saying is another pinch of salt onto my wounds." I could just imagine myself crying right now. Suddenly the infirmary door slid open as I sat there looking pathetic in front of it.

"Ah Touko. Do you need something?" N poked his head out and smiled at me.

"Sensei." I stared at his face for a little while. "N-no I just wanted…to meet the new teacher."

"Then why didn't you say so?" He helped me get up and lightly dragged me into the room. "You don't have to be so shy. Come in."

"I don't think shy is the right word for it." I muttered under my breathe.

"Hmm?" He turned back to look at me.

"Ahaha it's nothing." I shook my head and smiled.

"Hey Concordia, this young student wants to meet you." He smiled to her as he lets go of my arm.

"Ah, it's a pleasure to meet you." She smiled gracefully. Wow she's so dazzling…but I get this weird feeling by looking at her as well. I know I'm definitely straight but have I seen this lady somewhere before?

"Um it's very nice to meet you too." I smiled back. "So um…are you an old friend of Sensei's?"

"What a personally question to ask." She laughed lightly. Oh crap! That was very personal, what's gotten into me? "Well you could say I've been with N all his childhood."

"I see." My voice sounded a little coarse and low.

"I've always been there to comfort him. He is a very pure and innocent person you see?" She giggled lightly.

"Concordia." N nudged her a little.

"Well they say there's nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence." She continued to giggle at N and tap him on the shoulder.

"Nothing more beautiful and terrifying…than innocence?" I quoted.

"Something the matter?" She stopped laughing and asked.

"No. It's nothing." I smiled lightly and scratched my head.

It wasn't nothing. It definitely wasn't 'nothing'. I have heard someone say this before…but where? And when? Why am I suddenly remembering weird things? Ugh I can't put my finger on it…but I have heard someone say this to me before. Who was it regarding though? Is this just my imagination or maybe I heard this is a dream? Ugh I'm so confused! Where can I find the sources for these things? I need an answer but where and how? My head is spinning. I clasp onto it tightly. I feel this great migraine and rush forming in it but I can't do anything.

"Ahhhh! It hurts!" I yell.

"Touko! Touko! What's wrong?" N kneeled at my side as I collapse onto my knees. "Touko!"

"What's the matter? Are you alright?" Concordia asked feeling startled.

"Aghhh! O-ow! Ahhaa! Ughh! Make it stop!" I call out desperately. "N! Make it stop!"

"D-don't worry, wait there! I'll go get some medicine." He told me as he got off the ground. As he was about to turn around and run towards the cabinet I grabbed onto the hem on his pants tightly.

"D-don't go…not again." I manage to squeak out but after that everything turned black.

***Thud***


	7. What Is More Terrifying Than Innocence?

**What Is More Terrifying Than Innocence?  
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Ughh….where am I? I look around but only found the darkness. It looked in every direction; up, down, left, right but there was only an endless abyss of shadows. I peer down at my body, it seems that I'm still in one piece but…still where the heck am I? Am I still unconscious? I tried moving my body but I couldn't, it seems that I'm only able to float here. If so then how the hell am I suppose to get back to reality? Is everyone really worried about me right now? I sighed a little and continue to drift along in weightlessness. I don't know how much time has passed but suddenly out of nowhere a small glimpse of light appeared. Could that possibly be my way out? I tried 'swimming' towards it but I didn't get anywhere. I stare at the glow helplessly…until it started flashing.

"W-what the? What's going on?" I asked aloud as I shielded my eyes from the enormous amount of light.

It suddenly stopped. However an image took its place. It was an image of a girl. She appeared to have long brown hair tied up into a pony tail, she was wearing a white single, blue denim shorts…and a white/pink baseball cap. Was that me? It sure looked like me. I continued to look at what the image was doing. The girl seems to be talking to someone…it looks like a woman; long blonde hair, slender body and very pretty. That looked like the new nurse Concordia but…why is she here? I then started to hear a little bit audio…what are they talking about? I kept perfectly still and quiet.

"I am Concordia. I give peace and comfort to N. N has been separated from people since he was young." The blond woman started to speak; her expression was one of love and sadness. "He was brought up with Pokémon... Pokémon that were betrayed, mistreated and hurt by bad people."

"W-what is this?" I muttered to myself quietly.

"Ghetsis deliberately brought only those poor Pokémon closer to N. N was touched by their plight, and started pursuing the truth, thinking only of Pokémon." She continued. "N's heart is pure and innocent. But there is nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence."

"Nothing more beautiful and terrifying…than innocence?" I quoted again. "Isn't this the exact same thing that new nurse said?"

The images suddenly then disappeared and everything was dark again. No…no! I needed to see more. This could be the answer I'm looking for. I need more images to pop up; even though I have no idea what they are or even where I am…I still need to know more. Maybe these are my delusions or maybe I'm already dead…or maybe they are flashbacks. Who knows? Still whatever they are, they're revealing something to me…something that is important. I tried to turn around to find another source of light and lucky me there was one right below. Wait patiently to see what appears this time.

"Come on…I really need to see." I talked to myself. It's not weird now because no one's here.

After waiting patiently another image appeared. It was the same girl; the same girl that looked like me. This time it looks like she's in a house with….CHEREN and BEL? They three appear to be peering over a box that has 3 poke balls in it. It seems that 'Touko' got the first pick and she chose a Tepig. The threesome then started to battle with their new partners. The flash of light then faded out.

"W-what was that? Why are Bel and Cheren there too?" I asked myself anxiously.

Another flash of light appeared above me. I peered up and stared at it intently. Images started to form once again. This time 'Touko' is inside a…Ferris wheel? There seems to be someone next to her but the image is too out of focus to be able to see. I squinted my eyes to see if I could make the figure out but it was too hard. They then started to converse while I quietly listen.

"First, I must tell you… I am the king of Team Plasma." The person sounded like a man. "Ghetsis asked me to work with him to save Pokémon. I wonder how many Pokémon exist in this world."

"Ghetsis? Why in the world is her involved with 'me'?" I questioned but then went back to being silent because the conversation was still going on.

"There's no problem. You're part of the people we brought in to help us save the Pokémon. So, you're under my protection, as well." He continued. "Go, quickly, and let my battle cover your retreat. …Now then, Touko, do you follow my logic?"

"…Yes." The girl seemed to mutter quietly after they had gotten off the Ferris wheel.

"If true, your words please me." The man sounded as if he was a little bit happy. "Ah. Then… The future I envision… Perhaps I can't beat you here and now, but I'll battle you to buy time for these members of Team Plasma to get away!"

The flash of light then ended when they started to battle. What is with these weird flashbacks or whatever? Are they even in chronological order? Geez, watching them I feel even more confused. Who were these people and…was that girl inside the images…really me? If so…then how come I don't remember any of this? Maybe she's a doppelganger? No that seems a little bit too out of place. It could possibly be a flashback from the past but…isn't that a little hard to believe? I sit there floating and thinking at the same time. Nothing is coming into my head…well nothing that makes sense anyway.

"Geez…it's really lonely here isn't it?" I murmured to myself. "I want to go back home…"

Unexpectedly voices started to fill the void. I almost jumped out of my skin in surprise. I looked around to find the source of the voices, there must be a flashback thing somewhere…but I couldn't find one. Also the voices all seem to be from the same person. I sit back and listen intently.

"_As a result... Pokémon and Trainers, who care about one another, like you and your Pokémon, will be separated. And that does break my heart a little."_

"_The result was the same… But you…who are you?"_

"_And you are not swayed either way-more of a neutral presence, which is apparently a good thing."_

"_What I desire is a world for Pokémon and Pokémon alone. I will separate Pokémon from people, so Pokémon can regain their original power."_

"_Through our many battles, I got the feeling that you might be a Trainer who truly cares for Pokémon!"_

_"I couldn't understand it. I couldn't believe there were Pokémon that liked people. Because, up until that moment, I'd never known a Pokémon like that. The longer my journey continued, the unsure I became. All I kept meeting were Pokémon and people who communicated with one another and helped one another. That was why I needed to confirm my beliefs by battling with you. I wanted to confront you hero-to-hero. I needed that more than anything."_

_"Touko! You said you have a dream… That dream… Make it come true! Wonderful dreams and ideals give you the power to change the world! If anyone can, it's you! Touko! Well, then… Farewell!"_

The voices then suddenly stopped and I was left there speechless. What was all this? This person…he sounded a lot like Sensei. I am so confused…what's happening here? Is my consciousness trying to tell me something? If so it's not doing a very good job. Suddenly without me even realizing it…I started crying. W-what? Why am I crying? Is a bunch of flashback and voiceovers really enough to make me cry? I don't know why but…it seems that they've really affected me. I sit there crying for a little bit more. As I quietly sobbed in the abyss…another small glimpse of light floated towards me. I stare in awe at how beautiful this one was…it found it's place within the palms of my hands as I sat there. The light started to give off a wondrous glow as I peered into it.

"Huh?" I murmured as I intently stare at the image.

It was a room…there were no people in it, it was just a room. It appeared to be a child's play room. Purple and white checkered wallpaper covered the walls. There were scattered train tracks all over the sky themed carpet on the right. There was a green basketball hoop on the left with a model train stuck in it. A basket ball was sitting silently on the floor. At the back was a blue and yellow skateboarding ramp. Next to it on the left was a few large toy tires stacked on top of one another with a skateboard at the very top. On the back wall was a painting. This room…had a very pure yet eerie aura around it. As if it held many blissful yet heartrending memories. It kind of felt like innocent that had gone wrong. Then suddenly music started playing the background. It sounded like something from a music box…it was very light but also unnatural. My heart just felt like ripping apart when the combination of sound and sight infused together.

"Nothing more beautiful and terrifying than innocence?" I re-quoted yet again. "Was this what she was talking about?"

The music then started to fade out and the image started to grow dimmer and dimmer. It was not before long that the whole orb of light had disappeared entirely. I stare at my empty hands. That image has still left quite an impact on me…whose room was that?

"My heart feels so full yet empty at the same time." I murmured. "I've seen and heard enough…I want to go home now."

However I am still floating in this darkness…nothing is happening. I feel like crying again. When will I be able to get out of here? When will I be able to go home? I know I said that I needed to see more flashbacks but I've just about had enough…I can't stand it anymore. Will I have to spend the rest of my life drifting in this endless chasm of nothingness? I don't want that. I curled up into a ball as my thoughts start to get out of hand. Suddenly something touched me. I looked up slowly in fear but…it was just a small boy. He was almost see through; he was sparking with a nice bright glow.

"Why are you crying?" He asked. The child looked fairly thin, he had long tea green hair that was scruffy and tied back into a low ponytail. He was wearing an orange shirt and some brown shorts. He had bandages on his body and a few wounds. It looks like he's fallen down more than a few times.

"Who are you?" I ignored his question.

"I'm N." He child smiled at me.

"N?" I questioned.

"Yep, and what's your name?" He giggled a little.

"T-Touko." I replied quietly.

"That's a pretty name." He smiled. "Why are you here Touko?"

"To be honest I don't know where I am." I tried forcing out a laugh.

"Are you afraid?" He looked concerned. "Do you want to play with me?"

"Huh?" I gave him a confused look.

"You look like the Pokémon who I play with. They always look sad and as if they're about to cry." He looked down at his feet. "So if you play with me…you'll feel better."

"I will?" I asked. "B-but I want to go home."

"Home? What's a 'home'?" He cocked his head to the side innocently.

"You don't know what that is? U-um well it's a happy place where you live with your parents." I tried explaining the best I could. "You feel warm and safe there."

"It sounds nice." He smiled.

"Don't you have a home?" I asked.

"I live with people but…it doesn't sound as nice as what you just said." He lowered his head once again.

"Then are you happy?" I unravel out of my curled ball position.

"Happy? I'm happy when I play with my friends." He smiled. "My Dad doesn't play with me and I hardly ever see him. I don't know where my Mummy is either but I'm not complaining because that's normal."

"N-normal?" I questioned. This might sound terribly absurd…but why does this child remind me so much of N Sensei?

"Ehe." He giggled a little.

"Nothing is more terrifying than innocence." I seemed to have answered Concordia's question from before.


	8. Which Is Better: Pretense Or Reality?

**Which Is Better; Pretense Or Reality?**

"Say…N. Um do you know where I am right now?" I asked cautiously. The kid looked like he was about to break down any second from now.

"We're in your head silly." He laughed a little.

"My head?" I pondered at his reply. "You mean…right now I'm unconscious?"

"Um…I guess you could say that." He smiled as he bounced around the abyss encircling me.

"S-so then…what are you exactly?" I asked.

"I'm N." He replied casually.

"I know that but...like what are you made of?" I tried rephrasing the question. "And where did you come from?"

"I'm just N." He laughed. "I'm born in the Unova region."

"You don't say…" I sighed a little. "Anyway do you have any idea how I can wake up?"

"Why do you want to wake up?" He stopped jumping around and inquired innocently. "Don't you like me?"

"N-no you're very sweet. I like you a lot." I answered quickly.

"Ehe then you don't need to go home." He started leaping again. "Why would you want to go home anyway? Isn't the outside world just terrible?"

"What?" I spewed as he said that.

"People are so mean to my friends. They get hurt and are treated badly." N put of a sour expression. "Why would you want to wake up to such a horrible place? Wouldn't it be better to stay here and play with me?"

"B-but the outside world has a lot of nice things too." I tried to counter him.

"But that bliss is overshadowed by impurities and misery." N turned in my direction and started to walk towards me. "I thought you would understand…after all didn't you spend a long treacherous journey trying to defeat me?"

"H-huh?" I stared at the child as he advanced towards me. "What are you talking about?"

"Silly Touko…after all this time to think that you would forget…and here I thought that you were different." N looked down upon me as I stare up at him. "Having battles and saving the world…what a load of nonsensical garbage."

"Who are you?" I cowered beneath this so called 'child'.

"What a filthy world you live in. Pokémon are confined everyday and everyday they are hurt and mistreated. Even so you still want to live in _that_ sort of world. Pokémon can never be perfect and happy…especially when they are with humans." N crossed his arms and glared at me. "I thought you would've recognized this by now."

"What did you do with N?" I shouted.

"Ha! What did I do with him? I AM him." He snickered at me a little. "Hey~ Do you want to go back? Go back to your sweet little Sensei and all your clueless little friends?"

"…Ah" I couldn't say anything else.

"Fine…I'll wake you up for today but we'll meet later on." N threw me a malicious smirk. "Bye now Touko. Be safe."

***Thud***

"AHHHHH!" I woke up screaming and flailing my arms in the air.

"T-Touko!" A warm pair of arms quickly enveloped me. "Calm down, oh thank god you've awoken."

"Huh? Where am I?" I asked feeling slightly confused. I pushed the figure away from me to see who it was…it was my Teacher…It was N.

"You're inside the hospital. You've been unconscious for a week now." He puffed out a sigh of relief. "But you're awake now."

"I was unconscious for that long?" I questioned in surprised. "What happened?"

"Well you just started shouting that your head hurt and then passed out." N got up from his seat and went over to fetch what appears to be a wet towel. "It seems that you were having some terrible dreams according to the nurses here."

"O-oh...I guess I did see and hear some startling things." I commented as he placed the wet towel on my forehead."

"Is that so? If you don't mind…you could share some of it with me." N sat back down again and gave me a concerned look.

"W-well it's not something I'd want to share." I turned my face away from his. He just looked way too cute just then. I'm afraid I might get a nosebleed. "Oh but um…there's something I'd like to ask you Sensei."

"Hmm? What is it?" He perked up a little.

"It's kind of personal so…do you mind?" I scratched my head slightly.

"I guess so…" He forced out a little smile. "Wait…you're not asking about sizes are you?"

"SENSEI!" I yelled in embarrassment while hitting him with a pillow.

"I'm sorry, it's just the amount of female students who ask me that is endless." He flung his hands up to defend himself. "But I'm not sure why they'd want to know…I mean is my shoe size really that interesting?"

"Wait…did they actually ask you for your shoe size?" I stopped hitting him and stared in disbelief.

"Well no…but I mean what else could it be?" He pondered for a little while.

"Pfft…hahahah…ahhaaa…haha." I cracked up laughing at his innocence. "Thanks Sensei, I feel a little better now."

"Eh? I didn't do anything though." He gave me a confused look.

"Anyway I just wanted to ask about your past." I got straight to the point.

"My past?" He repeated.

"Y-yes…but did something 'happen' when you were younger?" I lowered my head in discomfiture.

"My father could've been a little bit cuddlier if you know what I mean." He smiled. "Either than that I had a perfect childhood."

"Is that so?" I looked up feeling slightly disappointed.

"However…" N continued to talk.

"However?" I repeated.

"I've been having these weird dreams since I was little…I'm not sure if the boy in the dream is me but he sure looks like me." N seems to be staring out into space. "Within the dreams the same things always happen. I would be sitting in a large playroom…all by myself. Then suddenly someone would bring a Pokémon to me and the poor thing would always be badly hurt."

"Wow…" I murmured. "How come I feel like I've come across something like this before?"

"Then the weirdest thing happens. The Pokémon would talk! It would tell me all these horrible and disgusting things people have done to them. The child would try and befriend it but no matter what he did the Pokémon would just attack him. They would tell him that they 'really hated' humans." N continued to tell his story but it seems more like he was recounting something from the past. "They would even attack the poor boy. It was only after going through a few scars that they were able to bond. These dreams…really made me feel sorry for the Pokémon of the world."

"Sensei…" I sat there in silence. He looks as if he's about to cry.

"Ah! Sorry I think I went overboard." He snapped out of his trance and laughed cheerfully. "To be honest I have never told anyone these dreams before. I haven't known you for long but I'm already revealing things like this."

"N-no, I thought it was really interesting." I lifted my hands in front of me and waved them back and forth as if I was trying to deny something. "I've also dreamed of some pretty strange things."

"Really? Since I told you some of mine, you should tell me some of yours." I smiled genuinely at me.

"Ah well…just then before I woke up…I had the strangest dream…well at least I hope it was a dream." I murmured. "I was floating in a black abyss…it was as if I was dead. Then out of nowhere little jewels of light would shine and form images…kind of like flash backs."

"Go on." N looked like he was really interested, he was almost leaning on to the hospital bed.

"Then I would see someone who looked like me but…she would be living another life almost. She was a Pokémon trainer. She was riding the Ferris wheel with the Leader of Team Plasma at one point and she also talked to someone called Concordia as well. It was strange." I tried to find a better way or wording my story. "Then I saw this room. It was a child's play room. It had a basketball hoop, a skating ramp, a sky themed carpet, some toy trains and a dark board. However it was a very eerie room. The background music was like a warped music box song."

"Touko…" N muttered.

"I don't know if I'm explaining this very well but I also saw a young boy after that. To be honest he looked like you Sensei…he even said his name was N. He asked me a lot of questions like why I was crying and such. He seemed really innocent but also deeply wounded." I started to space out a little at this point. "Then he started talking about how filthy this world was and how terrible Pokémon are treated by trainers. He then said that I forgot about my journey and that I didn't understand. After that I woke up here. I was really confused."

"Wow…what a story." N was already leaning on the bed with eyes filled with awe. "But…when you told me that somehow…I could picture everything perfectly in my head."

"Hey Sensei…do you believe in rebirth?" I asked involuntarily.

"Rebirth?" He quoted.

"As in being reborn again with the same soul. Do you believe that fate has the power to do that? Do you believe that people can meet again in a different life if they so desperately wanted it?" I kept going on but I didn't even realize it.

"Touko…" He murmured. "What are you trying to say?"

"Sensei… don't you get these strange feelings when you look at me?" I asked confidently. "Don't you get a sense of nostalgia when you hear people say certain things to you?"

"Like what?" He asked innocently.

"_What I desire is a world for Pokémon and Pokémon alone. I will separate Pokémon from people, so Pokémon can regain their original power."_ I quoted from the voice I heard in the flashback. "_Through our many battles, I got the feeling that you might be a Trainer who truly cares for Pokémon!"_

"Wh-what the…Where are you getting these from?" He asked in shock.

"_Touko! You said you have a dream… That dream… Make it come true! Wonderful dreams and ideals give you the power to change the world! If anyone can, it's you! Touko! Well, then… Farewell!"_ I quoted again. "Do you remember these?"

"I'm asking you where you got them from." N raised his voice a little.

"From you." I stated confidently. I wasn't sure about this however but it seems like I was correct in the end.

"Me?" He questioned. "I think you're feeling a little unwell Touko…you should rest."

"Maybe you're right…" I sighed. "Or maybe you're wrong. Sensei, this is the world of Pokémon. If something like this is happening it's not impossible."

"Touko…maybe what you're saying is true but right now you have to rest." N dismissed my concern casually.

"Sensei! Why won't you listen to me?" I cried out as he got up from his seat.

"Won't listen? Or don't want to listen?" He turned back and glanced at me. "Touko tell me, what will you do if we actually were affiliated with each other in the past?"

"What?" I asked.

"I'm asking you…what good is it finding out these things? What good will it do you?" He gave me an icy stare. "Why not just live in blissful ignorance and leave the past be?"

"Sensei…aren't you curious too? About our past? About why we feel this way?" I tried to convince him.

"Maybe I am but so what? Do you think after I find out I'll quit my job and marry you. Then we'll move to some isolated city in Unova?" He sighed. "You know that would be a crime right? Sure I might be a little naive but at least I know what is against the law and what's not."

"Sensei…" I murmured softly. "But Sensei I know there's something going on. If we can just find out then…"

"I know you're curious but please be realistic. I am your teacher and you are my student. We can never be anything more. I am sorry if I have given you the wrong idea." He got up and started walking towards the door. "Get some rest. You'll need it for school tomorrow."

"N!" I shouted as he closed the door behind him. "N! Wait! Why are you acting like this?"

"Talk to me when you have returned from your fantasy world and back to reality." N called out from behind the door. "Bye now. Be safe in there."


	9. Is This Being Curious Or Being Stupid?

**Is This Being Curious Or Being Stupid?**

"Ahhhh! Geez, what's wrong with you?" I squealed while throwing my pillow at the door. "Don't act all high and mighty! You..you naïve idiot!"

I flopped back down onto my bed and heaved a heavy sigh. I wonder why N was acting this way…it just makes me so irritated. I mean now I'm going to have to suffer through all these weird feelings and headaches, there's no way I'm going to give up. I just have to convince him that it'll all be worthwhile when he finds out about the past. However before I try to convince him…I should probably find out myself…just in case we were enemies or something.

"Arghh! I don't even know how I'm going to face him tomorrow!" I started rolling around on the bed like some love-sick fool. "Stupid N! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!"

I then quickly sat back up and tried to compose myself. I took in a few slow deep breathes and sat there in silence. I have to try and organize my thoughts otherwise this will all end up in flames. Well first I need to make sure things aren't awkward between Sensei and I, then I'll need to find out about the past. After I've done that I'll need to make him fond of me, then slowly I'll try to put memories and quotes in his head. By the time he realizes what I am doing it'll be too late. I smirked at my ingenious plan that I had just devised in about 30 seconds. I unleash a malice giggle as I drop back down on to the bed.

"Heh, Sensei won't know what hit him." I sighed a little. "But then after that…what are we going to do? Continue life as it is?"

I flung back up as N's words ring in my head. He was right at this point. So what will happen after this? I still need to attend school so I can't just quit and Sensei can't just leave his new job. If we were lovers it would be hard but if we were enemies it would also be hard. A relationship between student and teacher is taboo and I don't really want to put Sensei in that situation…but still…I really like him though. I like him and I don't even know why…

"Darn it…I'll just think about this tomorrow." I flopped back down and tried to go to sleep.

***The Next Day – At School***

"Uwahh~" I yawned as I casually walked into homeroom.

"Touko! Toukooooooo!" Suddenly Bel pounced on me and threw her arms around me. "Wahhhh! Toukoooo! I was so worried."

"Bel! H-hey calm down." I tried prying her off me but she was clinging on so tightly, it was impossible.

"Wahhhh! Touko! You haven't been to school in a week" She started sobbing uncontrollably. "T-Toukkooo!"

"It's okay. I'm fine now." I tried to convince her by hugging her back. "So you can let go now."

"Neverrrrr!" She cried as she restricted me even more.

"Ack! I can't breathe." I choked as I tried to force her arms open once again.

"Now now Bel. Don't be like that, you're going to kill her." Cheren walked up to us and tapped her on the shoulder. "If you really value Touko's life then let her go."

"O-okay…" Bel then obediently let go of me. "Sorry Touko, I was just so happy that you came back."

"Ahaha it's fine, don't worry about it." I tried laughing it off. "Anyway how's everyone been without me?"

"We visited you in the hospital nearly every day you fool." Cheren adjusted his glasses and sighed. "Really…Bel has been such a handful. She would keep asking me when you would wake up and as if I'd know that."

"Was it scary being dead for a week?" Bel asked feeling a little concerned.

"I wasn't dead." I answered immediately. "I was just unconscious."

"Was it scary then?" She repeated.

"Yes. Yes it was." I replied but it almost seems like a chore answering her questions.

"Really? What happened?" Bel asked again.

"Um well I had a lot of weird dreams." I scratched my head slightly.

"Really? What kind of dreams?" Bel perked up.

"Ughh…well like flashbacks but not of me but like…of someone who looked something like me? It's hard to explain." I laughed casually.

"I've got time." Bel smiled.

"Yep, well I don't." I gave her a cute smile and dashed out the classroom.

I didn't know where to run and homeroom was about to start however I didn't really want to spend half an hour vaguely answering questions. I just needed some peace and quiet so I can execute my plan perfectly. Although I do feel bad for blowing Bel off like that but I just can't deal with her for the time being. I ran quickly to the history classroom to see if my teacher was there. If there was anything I needed to know about the past then this lady is the person I should go to. Luckily for me she was preparing for her 1st period lesson which also happens to be my first class also (luckily). Although I haven't mentioned her name yet have I? Ugh let's just call her Ms. Juniper or Juniper Sensei.

"U-um Ms. Juniper." I exclaimed as I slammed open the door.

"T-Touko! Oh you surprised me there." She seems to be startled by my sudden appearance. "Isn't it time for homeroom? Why are you here?"

"No, that's not important right now." I stated as I quickly walked over to her. "I need help on my history."

"Not important? Young lady! Get back to homeroom this instant, you can ask me questions later." She scolded.

"No, I can't. Me being here right at this instant is of paramount importance." I lied. "I need to ask you something about the Great heroine and her journey."

"Must you be like this Touko?" She sighed a little and sat down in her chair. "Fine, what do you need to know?"

"Can you tell me a little bit more about her journey? Where did she go? Who did she meet? What happened between her and Team Plasma Leader N? What was N like? What was his past like? Did anything happen to him during his childhood? Where did he live?" I practically interrogated her.

"Slow down Touko." She seemed taken aback by what I had just said. "Listen I can only answer a handful of your questions. I am not Touko, I do not specifically what happened between her and Team Plasma Leader N."

"S-sorry." I apologized for my rashness and calmed down a little.

"Well I can tell you that Touko started off as a normal Pokémon trainer. Very early on in her journey she met N but she was unaware that he was the Leader of Team Plasma. At that point her journey became much more significant. Team Plasma would cause havoc all over the Unova region and she would get caught in all the excitement and trouble." Ms. Juniper took a deep breath in. "That's when N finally saw her as 'a heroine', he thought that she would be able to go up against him and battle him for the sake of the world. That's when he tried to revive Zekrom and told Touko to do the same. After obtaining all the Gym badges, Touko challenged the Pokémon League and defeated the elite 4. Then when she was about to verse the Champion, she saw N. That is when his castle ascended from the ground. It was there that she found out about his past and defeated him, along with Ghetsis and saved the world from the Pokémon Liberation."

"That's a whole lot of information." I said in awe.

"Yes well, is that all you wanted to know?" She asked.

"Uh…there might be some other things." I pondered for a little while. Although all this information is relevant I can't feel anything when hear it though. If I am somehow affiliated with this great heroine I should somehow feel something when I listen to this right? Darn. The only time that I start to remember things is when…I hear a specific quote or see something specifically.

"If that's all then return to your classroom." Ms. Juniper sighed and got up from her seat.

"No wait. Umm are there anyone related to N or Touko that are contactable?" I asked desperately.

"There are people but I doubt you'll even be able to reach them." She answered.

"O-okay…then what about some pictures?" I asked again.

"Pictures?" She repeated in confusion.

"Um like pictures of Touko or N. Maybe even places that she visited or N's castle would be a good one too." I explained.

"Yeah there should be some. Try going on the internet or some text books." She replied. "But why are you so interested in the topic now?"

"No reason." I lied. "Well got to run."

I ran back down the hallway towards my classroom. As I turned the corner to go past the infirmary I crashed into someone. Ahh! Geez that really hurt. I looked up to see who I bumped into and who would've guessed it. It was Concordia. Not N. I probably wished it was but it wasn't. I steadily got back up onto my feet and helped her up as well.

"I'm sorry. I should've looked at where I was going." I apologized sincerely.

"That's alright. You're not hurt are you?" She asked kindly. "I'm glad to see that you are already fit and well and running down hallways with enthusiasm."

"Yes I'm fine." I laughed a little.

"Well just to be sure let's take you into the infirmary to have a look." She took my hand and guided me towards the door.

"O-okay…" I obediently followed. Wait a minute. Infirmary? Infirmary = N? N = Embarrassment? I quickly took my hand away from hers and stepped back.

"Touko?" She cocked her head to the side looking worried.

"N-no! I'm fine! Perfectly okay!" I exaggerated and started hoping around while showing off my 'biceps'. Then to my dismay I tripped on the perfectly flat ground and slammed my face onto the floor.

"Oh my! Touko!" Concordia rushed to my side and tried to help lift me up. "Are you alright?"

"I see stars. Weeee~ I'm on a Lugia! Whoa! It's another Zubat! I'm gonna throw my bag at it!" I spurted out hazily. "Gyah! Don't eat my pizzaaaa. No mommy! I want to ride the Ferris wheel."

"Oh no! You're delusional, we have to get you into the infirmary and quickly." I felt Concordia using her arms to support me as she dragged me into the room.

"Hmm? What's the matter with her?" A voice asked.

"She fell. I think she hit her head pretty hard." Concordia commented.

"Nooo~ Tepig why won't you evolve to a Sawk?" I mumbled. "I need to get 95% in the exam. Hey wait! That's my hotdog~."

"I think we better lay her down for now." The voice seemed to chuckle.

I feel my back caressing against something soft. I guess this must be the bed. This feels nice…being back on a bed again. Oh gosh I feel so sleepy. Maybe I'll just…doze off for a little bit. Maybe just for about 5 minutes and then…I'll get up and…go back…to class. I yawned silently and slowly descended into a peaceful slumber.

***Blacks Out***

"Hey Touko~" A voice started calling out to me. "Toukoooo~ Wake up."

"Ngh…mommy?" I asked fuzzily.

"No silly. Just wake up and see." The voice giggled and started to fade.

"Hmm?" I gradually start to open my eyes. "Huh?"

All I could see was…nothing. It was just darkness. It appears that I am back in the eternal abyss of my mind. I looked around to see if I could find anything or anyone. I tried to listen for some noise but there was only silence. Then I desperately tried to find 'N'.

"N? Are you here?" I called out quietly.

"Uwahhh! You remembered my name. I'm so happy." His voice ringed from behind me. I quickly turned around to see a young boy smiling at me. "I told you we'll meet again."

"W-why am I here again?" I asked feeling surprised.

"Because you're starting to remember." N laughed casually. "Or should I say…you _want_ to remember."

"Want to remember?" I repeated.

"Yeah that's right." N started to spin around in circles like a little kid. "You come here because you want to find out about the past. Am I wrong?"

"N-no…I want to know about my past but…what does this place have anything to do with my past?" I asked curiously.

"Well let me put it this way." He sighed. "Whatever you learn in the real world effects what you see in this world."

"Huh?" I cocked my head to side in confusion.

"Alright listen closely." N walked over to me and sat down. "This world/mind/dream of yours was always dormant because in the outside world you haven't really experienced anything that made you regain memories of the past."

"What?" I asked in disbelief.

"Really? Are you just naïve or stupid?" N heaved a heavy sigh. "Okay well anyway this place became active once you started to feel déjà vu in the real world. Like when you start hearing quotes or seeing objects you've already seen before in the past."

"So…then you're saying that if I experience the right things outside…I can regain my memories?" I asked.

"There you go. You're catching on girly." N laughed.

"So then what's your purpose? Why are you here? To help me? Or prevent me from remembering?" I glared.

"Me? I'm just here because you're too nosy." He snickered.


	10. I Want To Know…Don't You?

**I Want To Know…Don't You?**

"Nosy?" I asked but now feeling even more confused.

"Geez, you sure ask a lot of questions don't you?" N sighed a little while scowling at me. "How about we leave the Q&A for later huh? I'll just give you want you came for."

"What I came for…what might that be?" I questioned yet again.

"Well aren't you impatient. Just wait and find out." N smiled. "Anyway I'll come back once the show's over. For now you can relax and enjoy the movie."

"W-wait! Where are you going?" I called out as the little figure started to fade away. "Geez…now what?"

Suddenly a little flash of light shone from beneath me. I glanced down to see what it was. It appears to be another one of those memory light bubble things. I change my sitting position to my comfort since I might be here a while like last time. I continue to stare at the orb of light as it turns into images. This time Touko appears to be in some sort of town…she's holding onto her Tepig. It looks as if a commotion is going on in the town square. 'Cheren' is telling her to come over. Hmm? Team Plasma? What are they doing?

"Today, ladies and gentleman, I would like to talk to you about Pokemon Liberation." The man seems to be the head of the group; he paced back and forth while talking.

Pokémon Liberation? Is that…person Ghetsis? After the man gave his speech, he went off somewhere with Team Plasma. Oh…the crowd disbanded but there's still someone there. The figure is too blurry but I think he's a man; he's walking over to 'Touko'.

"Your Pokémon... Just now, it was saying..." The figure stated.

"Slow down. You talk too fast." Cheren gave him a strange look. "And what's this about Pokémon…talking? That's an odd thing to say."

"Yes. They are taking." He answered. "Oh. Then, you two can't hear it, either…How sad. My name is N."

W-what? That's N? Suddenly the out of focus body started to become clearer. I-it really was N. He looks exactly like Sensei but only wearing different clothing. Wait…did he just say he can understand what my Pokémon was saying? So that's N? Come to think of it… did mention something about them meeting but at the time 'Touko' didn't know he was the leader of Team Plasma. This is too much…what's going on? Then am I really affiliated with N? Arghh! Wait I must not get distracted. Must keep watching.

"My name is Cheren, and this is Touko." Cheren introduced me with an indifferent tone. "We were asked to complete the Pokedex, and we just left on our journey. My main goal is to become the Champion, though."

"The Pokedex, eh? So…you're going to confine many, many Pokémon in Poke Balls for that, then." N looked disappointed. "I'm a Trainer, too, but I can't help wondering…Are Pokémon really happy that way?"

This man. He reminds me so much of Sensei…is it because they are the same person? Impossible this must have happened at least 200 years ago. Then somehow this 'N' must be related to N Sensei…Ugh I just don't know. Maybe we have been reborn again but even though that's the best reason now, it still does sound a little odd and unreasonable. Agh! I'll think about this later, right now I need to see what's happening.

"Well, Touko, is it?" He asked. "Let me hear your Pokémon's voices again."

Then out of nowhere N sent out a Purrloin and the orb of light disappeared. Now what exactly was that? A flashback again? Okay…okay…let's just say the person in there really is the Great Heroine since the circumstances resemble so uncannily. Then that person who was battling her was N, her nemesis. Then that also means the man who was giving the speech is N's father. Alright…so now I know that these flashbacks are about the Great Heroine…so then does that mean I am her…because I am seeing them. Or is it because I'm something like a 'Chosen One'? Ugh I need to ask little N more questions, just when will he be back?

Then as I tried to turn around another orb of light shone from above me, I had to look up to see what it was this time. In this one it appears that 'Touko' is in another city, it looks a lot more spacious than the last one. She seems to be heading for a certain building…it looks like a Gym. Oh I've seen that place in a book before it's the Nacrene City Gym. 'Touko' must be in Nacrene city! Just as she was about to go through the entrance N popped up. He started advancing forward as 'Touko' backed away.

"I... want to see things no one can see. The truths of Pokémon inside Poké Balls. The ideals of how Trainers should be." He spoke slowly. "And a future where Pokémon have become perfect... Do you feel the same?"

"…Yes?" She replied hesitantly, it appears as if she was a little startled by his sudden appearance.

"That so? I think my friends and I should test you to see if you can see this future, too." N stared at her and then suddenly sent out a Pidove.

A battle escalated between them but as soon as 'Touko' was about to send out her Pokémon the flashback faded away. I reached out my hand to try and stop it but it was futile. I sat there wondering about all this. It all seems so real and yet so fake. It just feels like this is all one big messed up dream. I waited for another ray of light to appear but nothing happened. So I sat there anticipating when little N would return.

"Boo!" He yelled as he placed his palms around my eyes. "Guess who?"

"I don't know." I answered coldly.

"Awww~ Touko's no fun." N laughed as he ran around me. "Did you enjoy the movie?"

"Um…I don't know…it was confusing yet clear at the same time." I answered.

"Well~ I guess you can ask me questions now if you REALLY want to." He innocently suggested.

"Then…am I really Touko?" I perked up.

"What kind of an idiotic question is that?" He gave me an aloof look. "What? You've been in here too long that you've lost your sanity?"

"N-no I meant…Am I the Great Heroine?" I tried rephrasing the question.

"Yes and no." He answered.

"Then is N Sensei…is he the Leader of Team Plasma?" I asked again.

"Yes and no." N causally replied.

"Then are you also N Sensei?" I was feeling a little agitated.

"Yes and no." He started to whistle at this point.

"Can't you give me a straight answer?" I yelled.

"Y-you don't have to be so mean…" N started to tear up. He squatted into a ball and gave me the 'puppy dog' expression.

"Oh! Don't you give me that look." I commanded.

"Pfft, how can you treat a kid like this?" He got up and sighed at me. "You're not going to be a very good mother."

"Just…tell me what I need to know." I collapsed at the thought of even continuing to play games with this kid.

"Fine. Whatever." He sat up in front of me with a bored appearance.

"So is it true that these flashbacks are about the Great Heroine?" I questioned.

"Yep." He flopped down onto his back and yawned.

"Then am I a reincarnation of her? Or am I reborn into this world with her soul?" I was a little embarrassed about this one because it sounded so stupid.

"Yeah." N kicked his right leg up into the air and then his left.

"So that means…Team Plasma Leader N…was reborn as N Sensei?" I asked quietly.

"You got it." N yawned again and rolled onto his side to face me.

"Then why am I reborn as the same person? Also what's the point of me remembering?" I sounded a little desperate right here.

"Dunno." He started to draw little animals in the air. "Maybe cause you guys really wanted to see each other again or something illogical like that?"

"Like fate?" I asked with a smile on my face.

"Maybe…Well it was great hanging out with you Touko but it seems that you should go back to the other world now." N sat up looking a little dazed. "I'm just gonna send you back now. Later."

"W-wha? But I still have questions." I yelled. Too late.

***Thud ***

I hazily opened my eyes to find myself…in the hospital again? What? Again? I sat up slowly but I still feel as if I'm in a daze. I looked around the room fuzzily to find N Sensei resting his head on the side of my bed. Why is he here again? He says not to get my hopes but…when he does things like these…how can I not? Is he asleep? I tried shaking him by the shoulders lightly but he didn't budge, it seems that he's in a pretty deep slumber. Well I might never get this chance later in life so I bent over a little closer to N's face and analyzed it closely. He looks so cute when he's sleeping. His eyelashes are so long, his skin looks so smooth for a guy…and his hair looks really soft as well. Maybe…I'll just have a little touch, it's not like I'm committing a crime. I hesitantly lifted my finger and traced N's eye lashes with it. Then I started to ruffle his hair slightly, it really is soft. It's almost like a fury stuffed animal.

"Wow…so soft." I then compared his silkiness with my own. "Sensei…you're hair is so soft, it's like cat's fur."

"Ngh~" N mumbled.

"Kya!" I quickly raised my hand just in case he was about to wake up."

"Mmm…huh?" He looked up at me hazily. "Touko? You're awake?"

"Y-yeah? U-um you didn't feel anything or hear anything just now right?" I asked nervously.

"What? Hear what?" He asked slowly.

"O-oh it's nothing." I puffed out a sigh of relief.

"You mean like eyelashes, skin and hair?" He chuckled a little.

"Y-you were awake?" I jumped back slightly with a bright red face. "Sensei! Then why didn't you say anything?"

"Well you said it felt like cat's fur so…it was sort of like a complement." He laughed. "Anyway are you feeling better? You've been asleep for 3 days now."

"3 days?" I repeated. "Geez, why do I keep sleeping for so long?"

"I'm worried. You probably want to get this checked out." N looked straight into my eyes. "I have tried examining you when you were unconscious but I couldn't find anything."

"Sensei…are you really worried about me?" I asked feeling slightly hopeful.

"Of course." He raised his voice. I'll have to admit that made me heart skip a beat. "You're my precious student after all."

"I see." I looked down at my feet for a little while. "Well I'm perfectly alright so don't worry about me. Ahaha you should be more wary of the whole female student body getting jealous because you're treating me special."

"Touko?" N cocked his head to the side in confusion. "Is something wrong?"

"No…it's nothing." I lied. "I'm sorry for being so rash and illogical last time."

"No it was my fault. I should've have been so harsh on someone who was ill." N sighed. "I didn't mean to upset you. Haha I hope you don't hate me now."

"I can never hate you." I smiled genuinely. "How could I possibly hate Sensei?"

N stayed silent. He just looked at me. It wasn't a look of disdain nor was it a look of temptation. To me… it was a look of sudden realization. Something like an epiphany.

"Sensei?" I asked in confusion. "Something the matter? You've been staring at my face for quite some time."

"Huh? Oh! Sorry!" N flung backwards as soon as I said that. "Nothing… I was just spacing out. Don't look too much into it."

"Sensei…would you scold me if I said I remembered a little bit?" I questioned innocently.

"Remember? Remember a little bit of what?" He asked.

"The past." I turn to look at him right in the eyes.

"…I guess not but I'd rather not hear about it." N rotated his head in the other direction.

"Is that so?" My voice went dimmer. "Then what if I told you that I want you to remember as well?"

"Isn't my choice if I want to remember or not?" He scowled.

"That's true…but still I can't help myself." I went to reach for his hand. "N…what did Tepig say about me?"

"What?" He quickly whipped his head back towards me.

"Did he say I was a good person? Did he say he liked me?" I gave N a guiltless look. "I'm sure you'd know."

"Touko? What are you trying to do?" He tried to back away but I didn't let go of his hand.

"Don't you want to know why? Aren't you curious that I know you can understand a Pokémon's speech?" I asked. "Hmm? Aren't you the least bit interested that I know your secret?"

"I-I am but…" N finally escapes from my grasp.

"How's your father? Is Ghetsis treating you well?" I continued with my convincing or advances, which ever suits. "What about your Pokémon? Are you confining them in Poke Balls? You know they'll never become perfect that way right? Didn't you say you can see things people can't? You know the secret to becoming an ideal trainer, don't you?"

"Touko stop!" N blocked his ears and got up from his seat. "Why are you doing this? How come you know everything I feel and think? Just who and what are you?"

"I'm Touko." I smiled lightly at him but at the same time, looking at his face makes me want to cry. "N…I want to remember everything. Don't you?"


	11. Are These Feelings Genuine?

**Are These Feelings Genuine?**

"Ugh…I…I…um…" N stuttered.

"Hmm?" I crawled off the bed and walked towards him.

"Stay back…d-don't come any closer." He flung his hands up hesitantly in defense.

"N…answer me." I pinned him to the wall.

"Uwah! W-what are you doing?" N blushed angrily but I continued my advances. Really, it's called taking the lead.

"N~" I leant in closer towards his body. "Ne, what are you thinking right now?"

"U-gh j-just get off me." N continued to stammer and blush at the same time. He quickly turned his face away from mine.

It seems that he's not use to this sort of intimate attention. Well I have to say that I'm not either. In his eyes right now I might look like some courageous femme fatale but really…inside I'm dying of embarrassment. What am I even doing? This sort of foxy acting isn't my thing. Geez, my heart is racing uncontrollably right now and I have no idea where I'm going with his whole charade.

"N...Look at me." I lifted my hands to grasp his face. "Don't you recognize me at all?"

"N-no! You're just my student." N struggled to pull away but in the end his eyes met with mine. "Uhhh….um…"

"Really? Is that all I am to you?" I pulled his face closer towards mine. I could see his cheeks grow into a deeper shade of red.

Uwahhh! What am I doing? This is so embarrassing! It's like watching some passionate romance anime with the gender roles reversed but only I'm acting it! I hope my face isn't showing any signs of intense overheating. What do I do now? Do I kiss him? No no no no no that would be taking it too far…then do I pretend this was all a joke? No, he'd get angry with me…What if I suddenly faint and pretend I was possessed by something…Geez now I'm really going crazy. UGH! WHAT. DO. I DO? Oh Lord, help me! Just what did I get myself into?

"I-I've just only met you r-recent so…" N stuttered.

"Aren't you just making up excuses? Or is it true that you've really forgotten everything about me?" I sighed and pulled his ears towards my lips. "If that's the case…shall I help you remember?

"Uwahh! N-no!" N jumped a little at my directness. Wow…since when did he get so cute. I think N's reaction just sent my hormone meters off the chart. So I quietly took a deep breath and went in for the kill. I opened my mouth and lightly nibbled on N's ear.

"Do you feel like remembering now?" I pulled away while asking him in a seductive voice.

"…." N didn't reply.

"Hmm? What seems to be the problem?" I asked while running my hand down his cheek.

"…." N remained silent.

"N…?" I cocked my head slightly. "Are you alright?"

"…." Still no answer.

"H-hey, this isn't funny." I shook him by the shoulders a little. "H-hey, N."

"…." N stood there motionless.

"Oh no. What did I do?" I started to panic at this point. I rashly whacked N upon the head to see if he'd react.

***Thud***

"Eh?" I looked down at my feet to see a small pool of blood. "KYAAAAAA!"

Oh my god! I killed him! Oh no! I knew this was a bad idea. Stupid Touko. Ughhh! What do I do now? I've killed someone! Holy Ho-oh I'm a murdered. I quickly knelt down to hold N in my arms. Please don't be dead. Hmm? But upon closer inspection…the pool of blood doesn't seem to be coming from any vital organs…it was coming from his nose. Don't tell me he hit his nose on the ground and it started bleeding? Or could it possibly be… Just at that moment N started to wake up.

"Ngh…." H mumbled as he rubbed his head.

"N! You're alive." I hugged him close to me.

"Hmm?" He murmured in confusing. "Ugh…AH!"

N quickly pushed me away from him and covered the bottom half of his face…the blood seems to be rushing out at a faster rate now. He then scurried 5000m across the room with his palm over his nose…I guess he got a nose bleed for the all the wrong reasons. What a classic reaction…and from such a perverted teacher.

"H-hey…are you alright? U-um sorry about that." I tried to crawl over to him but that somehow made his nose spurt out more blood.

"D-Don't! Don't crawl towards my suggestively like that!" N raised his free hand and waved it around as if that was going to repel me.

"U-um…excuse me?" I stopped and sat there in confusion. "I think we should probably get that checked out first."

"N-no! You she-fox don't come near me! I'm not a pedophile!" N started blushing all of a sudden and turn around to face the wall.

She-fox? Really? Couldn't he have thought of something else to call me? And what's with this whole pedophile thing…He's only a few years older than me… Geez I think that acting really got to him.

"U-um I'll go get a wet towel." I stood up and quickly walked towards the bathroom leaving N sulking in the corner.

"Stay in there. Don't come back out." He pouted as I returned with a wet towel and a basin filled with warm water. I walked over towards him and knelt down, placing the basin beside me.

"Now turn this way." I reached out my hand to pull his face towards mine. "Come on Sensei, you need to get that cleaned up."

"No! Let go of me." N flung his free hand in my direction…which I easily caught. "Uwahh! What are you doing?"

"Cleaning you up." I started dabbing the cloth on his face with my free hand. "Geez, why are you acting like such a child?" Hasn't anyone ever cleaned up after you when you were younger?"

"Why are you being so kind all of a sudden?" N loosens his force over his hands; it seems that he's starting to calm down.

"Sorry for making you feel uncomfortable…I won't do that again." I sincerely apologized as I continued to wipe the blood off his face. "Sorry…but I just wanted you to remember me, that's all. I guess I didn't really think about your feelings."

"Touko." N takes his palm away from his face and lets me wipe his nose thoroughly. It's as he's letting me act as his mother.

"There! Nice and clean." I smiled at the perfectly spotless face.

"You're kind." He murmured.

"Eh? What are you talking about?" I stood up and brought the basin and towel back into the bathroom.

"Even though you're the one who's sick…you're taking care of me. Ironic isn't it?" He laughed half-heartedly.

"That's because I…" I stopped half way.

What is it that I feel of sensei exactly? Do I love him? Is that why I want him to remember the past so much? Is that why? Or am I just getting ahead of myself? Am I just thinking I love him? Is this just some silly crush or infatuation? Do I really love sensei? Am I just basing this feeling off the past...the past that I'm not 100% sure about? Do I just want Sensei to remember due to my selfishness? Do I just want to satisfy this continuously growing feeling of uneasiness? If that's the case…do I truly love him? Aren't I being too unreasonable? I want him so much yet… I don't think I deserve someone so kind-hearted and pure. If this is my way of thinking…then do I really love you?

"It's because you're important to me." I smiled.

_I couldn't say 'I love you'. Why is that?_

"Is that so?" N smiled back. "Well then until you can prove to me that your feelings are genuine and that remembering will benefit me…I will still continue to refuse the past."

"Then…if my feelings are genuine." I walked over to his side and sat down. "Would you accept them?"

"I don't know…" N turned away from me.

"Ahaha. Sorry. That's kind of a silly question." I laughed. "Of course people will only accept another's feelings if they feel the same right? Then…I'll try my best to get you to like me Sensei."

"Hmpf." N chuckled a little and smiled. He then lifted his hand to pet my head. "You're a good girl."

"Eh?" I started to blush a bit at his complement.

"You're parents must have raised you well." He continued to pet my head. "You have a good life so…make the most of it. You don't have to waste your feelings on me."

"They're not a waste!" I retorted which seemed to shock him a little bit. "Don't say that my feelings are a waste…because that's just sad."

"Haha. It must be so nice to be young and hopeful." N laughed and took his hand off my head.

"Hey! What do you mean by that? Are you saying you'll never accept my feelings?" I cried out.

"Don't you think this conversation is getting a little too personal?" N smiled jokingly.

"No, I don't." I laughed.

We continued to bicker for a few more minutes but it's mostly just me retorting to his smart remarks. When was the last time I had a light talk with N? I don't even remember…I was just so caught up in trying to remember and trying to get him to remember that…I haven't been able to appreciate him at all. I was just thinking about the future when…the present was such a wonderful gift already. Even though my heart still sinks sometimes when I'm with him…I can also feel it jumping lightly at the same time. I've been focusing on the pain too much…I should've just enjoyed N's company. Sure it hurts knowing that he may not ever return my feelings but these feelings weren't 100% pure right? I think…I should just slow down and sort out my emotions. If I really did love N then…I would want this whole remembering thing to be mutual. I can't be selfish and rush these things when he's still indecisive. If I truly love N…then I'd wait for him. So that's what I'm going to do.

"Well I should probably go now. Get well soon." N stood up slowly and I copied him. "See you tomorrow."

'See you tomorrow'…what a simple form of happiness N has given me.

"Yup. See you." I waved lightly as he walked out of the door. "Really…nothing good happened but…why do I feel so happy?"


	12. You're Jealous, Right?

**You're Jealous, Right?**

That night I was released from hospital. Mom obviously was worried sick about me. She wouldn't even let me walk to the bathroom on my own, probably due to some intense fear of me suddenly slipping on a bar of soap and smashing my head onto the bathtub. Really? I mean, did it really look like I was so unwell that I needed assistance to take a shower on my own? Oh well, I guess I do appreciate the kindness. I've made her scared half to death so I better be agreeable, at least for this week. The next morning I woke up nicely. It just seemed like any other day. I quickly got dressed and was about to dash out of my room; however, I needed to fix up my fringe in the mirror before that. Don't want Sensei to see me looking like a mess. I quickly ran downstairs and out the door. I have a feeling today's going to be a good day for some reason. I feel like Sensei and I have gotten to know each other better…it's a nice feeling. After a few hours of listening to some lectures and doing work in class I made my way to the infirmary. Along the way I saw Cheren walking towards me.

"Cheren! Hey, I'm back. Did you miss me?" I greeted him happily.

"Touko. I'm glad to see that you are all right." He gave me a genuine smile. "On your way to see Sensei again?"

"Aha, you know me too well." I scratched my head in embarrassment a little.

"No. It's just plain obvious. Really, I think it may be becoming a part of your daily routine." Cheren remarked as he pushed his glasses up a little.

"Ehhh? Don't be like that Cheren. You should smile once in a while you know?" I teased. "Or are you just afraid that your face will crack?"

"W-what?" He gave me a stunned look but then proceeded to smile. "Hmph. What nonsense. Here, I got you these. You'll probably need them some time later in life."

"Hmm? What are these?" I asked inquisitively while he places a small box into the palm of my hands.

"Bandages. I thought you should stop borrowing some from N Sensei." He comments. "Look, they even have Reshiram and Zekrom pictures on them. I know you like silly things like that."

"Reshiram…and Zekrom." I repeated.

"Yes. You know? The two legendary Pokémon who helped created Unova?" He flashed me a weird look.

"No no. I know who they are but…suddenly it feels weird looking at them." I said while staring at my package of bandages.

"Okay. Now I think I know why you need to visit the infirmary so often." Cheren spoke slowly while trying to lead me in the right direction. "Please by all means. Don't let me keep you from your health."

I swear he added the word 'mental' in front of 'health' in his mind.

"O-okay. Well thanks for these." I smiled weakly and made my way to the infirmary.

I quickly opened the door to see if Sensei was in. Who am I kidding of course he was, that's why I came down here in the first place. I come here so often now that he basically knows when I'm in front of the door and of course today was well he greets me nicely.

"Oh. Hi, Touko." He smiled. "Did you come to see me?"

"No. I came to play poker with you." I gave him a sarcastic look. "Of course I'm here to see you Sensei."

"Wow. You're quite uppity today? Did something good happen?" He asked.

"Hmm. No, not particularly." I replied with a smile.

"Oh? What's that you're holding in your hands?" He asked inquisitively.

"These? They're just bandages Cheren gave me. Aren't they cute?" I showed him the package and continue to gloat about how Cheren was such a loyal and caring person. "He acts all aloof but really he's a big softy underneath."

"Charming." N commented sharply.

"Huh? What's wrong?" I gave him a look of concern. "You seem kind of upset all of a sudden."

"It's nothing." He replied harshly. "He gives off the impression of being too power hungry sometimes."

"What? Really? I don't think so at all. Cheren's not like that. Sure, he's ambitious but you make it sound like he's a bad guy." I chuckled a little trying to imagine Cheren as some demonic king.

"Is that so?" N glares at me. "Whatever. I think all he really cares about is becoming stronger."

"H-hey Sensei. What's wrong with you today? Why are you saying such awful things about Cheren?" I asked feeling a little bit concerned. "You don't even know him that well."

"Also that Bel girl clings to you too much." N sneered. "She must be very weak to be_ that_ dependent."

"H-hey! Sensei! That was uncalled for." I retorted. "Why are you saying such things about my friends?"

"But alas, not everyone can face the sad truth." N turned to the window. "Not everyone can become stronger."

"W-what the-? Where have I heard that before?" I asked aloud.

"I don't know Touko. Where have you heard that before?" He spoke in a clear and strong tone. "You, who are not, swayed either way. A neutral presence. Can you really be friends with them?"

"W-wait. I've heard all this stuff before…Sensei, could it be that you're remembering?" I asked in shock.

N didn't answer. He just stood there staring out of his window as if the meaning of life was written in the sky or something. He then turns around and picks up my packet of bandages and stares at it but it's the angriest looking stare I had ever seen. He then drops the packet onto his desk harshly. What's up with his mood swings? One second he's happy-go-lucky and innocent the next he's like some philosopher who's lived 200 years or something. It's just so hard to keep up with. It's like he's treating me as if I'm on the same level as him but the same time he's doing all that while on a pedestal. Maybe…there's more to him that meets the eyes. Could it be that _I'm_ the one who's been naive all this time?

"Wait a minute." Then it hit me and a let out a huge smirk. "Could it be that you're jealous, Sensei?"

"W-what?" He jumped at the conclusion. "What on Earth gave you that idea?!"

"Hmmm? Oh I don't know. A women's intuition perhaps?" I chuckled. "That and you were giving me the most sour looks when I was talking about Cheren."

"I-I'm your teacher! I-I have no need to be jealous." He stammered.

"Yeah, you're right. I probably would be happier with Cheren anyway." I feigned innocence.

"W-what! H-he seems to be really arrogant. I don't think he's a good person." N stuttered again but this time with more emotion. You could really see the stress in his face.

"Hmm. Now that I think about it. I prefer Sensei more. I mean I think we did have a connection in the past." I lightly tapped my index finger on my chin and pretended to ponder.

"Now, now don't get too rash." He said that but I could hear that his tone was a lot lighter and he was smiling a little.

"Pfft. You're really amusing Sensei." I laughed. "It's like everything you're feeling just pops right up on your face."

"T-that's not true." N blushed a little while crossing his arms.

"Haha. You're like an open book Sensei." I walk over to his desk. As her tries to move back his clumsily knocks Cheren's packet of bandages over. "Ah! Sensei!"

I scurried over to the place where they dropped to see Reshirams and Zekroms scattered everywhere. My mind was suddenly in a blur. Oh no, not again. I've had enough of this fainting business. Crap…I can't hear what Sensei is trying to say to me anymore. Ugh he looks really worried and he's shaking me too. Darn it. Everything's fading to black. I can barely keep my eyes open but at least it doesn't hurt anymore…oh well…I'll see you…in a few days….N.


End file.
